This is part 1 of a 5-part series on Lunch Actually, a dating company in Asia, after trying out their service in 2012. Opinions expressed here are my own.
- Part 1: Joining Lunch Actually (Why I’m Joining a Dating Agency and My Upcoming Series on Arranged Dating)
- Part 2: Initial Consultation and Membership Enrollment
- Part 3: Going Through Image Coaching
- Part 4: The Date Process (And Conclusion of my Lunch Actually Review)
- Part 5: My Date Coaching Experience
Update 2015: It’s been a few years since I wrote this series and I’m returning to update it and wrap it up.
Summary: After joining Lunch Actually in 2012 (on a five-date package kindly sponsored by them), I went on four dates over a 10-month period. I didn’t meet someone compatible though it was an enriching experience.
I met my soulmate a few months later — he’s someone I already knew from university, and we got back in touch randomly one day — and we got married in May 2014. :)
After getting attached, I closed my account with Lunch Actually, and returned to update this review series with concluding thoughts. If you’re here to learn more about Lunch Actually, I share my experience enrolling and going through the dates. Hopefully it’ll give you an idea of what to expect and help you decide whether to sign up!
Separately, I’ve written many articles sharing tips on how to find your one. Check out my topics section, under “Love” category. :)
Hello everyone! :D Today’s announcement is sort of random (but not really too). I’ve been thinking of joining Lunch Actually, a premium matchmaking service that arranges one-to-one dates between compatible singles, and I’m intending to blog about my upcoming experience with them.
Interest in Lunch Actually
Some of you may remember Lunch Actually from the feature I did on my YouTube channel long ago in 2010; it was basically an interview I did with their CEO Violet Lim about dating tips for singles. Incidentally, she and her husband Jamie (who is the co-founder of LA) knew about me and had been following PE even before I approached them, which I thought was really cool!
During my interview, I got to know more about LA and thought it seemed like a great avenue to meet compatible people. However, I held off from doing anything about it as I was busy with other things then (namely growing my business), and dating wasn’t my priority.
It’s been two years since then and I think I’m now ready to give Lunch Actually a try. LA is present in several countries in Asia; since I’m in Singapore, I’ll be enrolling at their Singapore branch (also their head office if I’m not wrong).
Negative Stereotypes Towards Arranged Dating
Because I think arranged dating and being proactive about meeting people (especially in a romantic context) are quite frowned upon in some places including Singapore, I decided to openly blog about my experience to let everyone know that there’s nothing negative or embarrassing about going on arranged dates. Such a thinking is silly at best.
Case in point: I had already intended to join Lunch Actually and blog about my experience a few weeks back and briefly mentioned it to some people. The most common response I got was, “Why would you want to write about something like this?”, suggesting an undercurrent belief that joining a dating service was taboo, shameful, and perhaps even “desperate.” Which is really unfortunate!
The funny thing is, meeting compatible people is something that many singles think about (trust me, I know many singles and this is something we talk about all the time), but many shy away from taking action. I think this is ridiculous and a result of limiting beliefs. This further reinforces my desire to blog about my experience, because I don’t think there’s anything to be ashamed about! Also, I figure there are probably some who are curious about LA or arranged dating in general, so hopefully this series will give you guys some insights into that. :)
Why I’m Writing this Review
Prior to contacting Lunch Actually, I tried searching for “Lunch Actually reviews” on Google but found nothing helpful. In fact, I didn’t find anything! -_-” I did find a blog where the blogger talked about his (or her?) first and second dates, but there was no update after that.
My guess is that people who have tried the service are probably resistant towards talking about it, probably due to stigmas like being seen as a loser. Another reason is that some of these people may be busy managerial professionals who don’t frequent forums or write blog entries, which is supposedly LA’s target audience.
My plan is to write about my experience with LA at the key stages of their service, from consultation to enrollment, to date arrangement, culminating to my final review of their service. I’ll be writing this review in an authentic manner, like with all things on PE.
I will not be writing about the people I meet or anything considered proprietary to their company. The former is to protect the dates’ privacy, so I hope you can understand! Rather, I’ll focus on sharing the agency’s date arrangement process and my experience with it. I seek your help to respect others’ privacy by not asking me about them, thank you!
Don’t expect weekly posts about LA because it doesn’t work that way. Apparently they don’t send people on weekly dates — from what I understand, it can take anywhere from two weeks to a couple of months for someone to go on a date. This depends on your date criteria, the candidates they have in their database, and whether you match those candidates’ criteria. I’ll also not be going on “dates” right away until after about four to six weeks; according to them this is standard for new members.
By the way, none of this writeup is sponsored in any way. I’m paying for the service myself (or rather, I’m intending to pay for it, because I’ve not even signed up yet). I’ve already booked for a consultation with them later today (they offer free consultations) and will blog about how it goes later.
* Update, July 3, 2012: Lunch Actually kindly offered to sponsor my membership of a five-date package, but rest assured that this review will remain entirely objective as with everything I write on PE. My objective is to share my experience and provide a transparent account of what arranged dating can be like.
I was told that LA rejects people if they are not confident of finding good matches for them. I know someone who was rejected before as the agency didn’t feel that they would have the right matches for her. This makes sense since it’s a two-way process; if they enroll everyone but can’t get matches for them, it’ll only create a very bad customer experience in the end.
Opening Myself Up
Maybe you’re wondering why I’m joining LA. Is it to find love? To get into a relationship? What is it?
For the most part, I’m enrolling to open myself up to meeting new, compatible people. I’m not sure how their matching system works or how good it is, so to hope to find love through it will be a bit of a stretch. Moreover, I think dating takes time. It’ll be nice to meet your match right away, but often times it’s a discovery process for you and the other person too.
For the record, I’m not expecting to meet THE ONE from it—it’ll be nice if that happens—but I’m mainly doing this for the experience, to open myself up, and to see what unfolds. Yes I’m open to meeting a romantic partner, yes I’m open to being in a relationship, but I don’t know how possible it is to meet the right person in 3 or 5 dates. What I do know is that I haven’t tried such services before, that the idea of being set up on dates sounds fun and exciting, and I’m excited to see the kind of dates I get matched with.
If you’re hoping to enroll to meet your ONE, I’ll recommend that you reconsider. If you are short on money or it’s too expensive for you and you still want to sign up because you think that investing this money will bring you your soulmate, I’ll also recommend not signing up because it may well not happen. Dating is a process and it’s not realistic to expect to meet the right person in just 3, 5, or 10 dates. Chances are you will be disappointed and it’ll create a negative experience for yourself in the end.
Why Not Try Other Avenues of Meeting People?
Well, I’ve never tried Lunch Actually or such services before, so I think it’ll be fun to give it a shot. I’m always keen to try new experiences.
For the record, I’m already meeting a lot of people organically — through friends, business events, social events, etc. I do so simply because I love meeting people. I’ve come to realize from my Europe/U.S. travels that I’m very people-centered and I love making new connections. Not a surprise considering my life purpose is all about people! :)
Based on LA’s high pricing, I see that as a filter to remove casual daters*, because it suggests that the people who sign up with them are considerably serious in dating/ meeting someone. Plus I’m ready to meet my partner, so why not sign up for a service where others are on it to date? It’ll be interesting to see who I get matched with based on the consultants’ expertise!
*Update: After going on some dates and reading some members’ postings in online forums, I realized that this can go both ways. While there are serious singles who sign up for premium dating services because they really want to find “the one,” there are also guys who do so as a way to procrastinate on finding love (by having a service send them dates constantly, it gives them less reason to act), to “shop” around for dates, and to “check out” what it can offer. So ultimately it really depends on who you meet and get matched up with. The best is to approach it with an open heart and not make assumptions.
As for avenues like online dating, I’m open to them, just that it’s not a channel I’m using now.
Proceed to Part 2: Initial Consultation and Membership Enrollment
This is part 1 of a 5-part series on Lunch Actually, a dating company in Asia, after trying out their service in 2012. Opinions expressed here are my own.
- Part 1: Joining Lunch Actually (Why I’m Joining a Dating Agency and My Upcoming Series on Arranged Dating)
- Part 2: Initial Consultation and Membership Enrollment
- Part 3: Going Through Image Coaching
- Part 4: The Date Process (And Conclusion of my Lunch Actually Review)
- Part 5: My Date Coaching Experience
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