Affirmation Challenge Day 6 [Self-Worth]: “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.”

This is Day 6 of the 15-Day Affirmation Challenge where hundreds of participants around the world gather to practice positive affirmations for 15 days in July 2014. The challenge is now over, but you can still do the tasks in your own time. Visit the overview page for all Affirmation Challenge tasks and posts.

Affirmation Challenge

Dear everyone, welcome to Day 6 of our 15-Day Affirmation Challenge! :D

Here is the overview of all the posts for the challenge so far:

Now, let’s move to today’s task, which is on…

Day 6: [Self-Worth]

Affirmation Challenge, Day 6 [Self-Worth]: "I'm worthy of love, success, and happiness."

 Today’s affirmation: “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.”

In all my five (now going on six) years of coaching, one issue I’ve observed among many clients, workshop participants, and readers is the feeling of low self-worth. This low self-worth can be the result of negative childhood stories, setbacks (be it when they are young or in their adult years), or things not going their way. With my coachees, I’d then work with them on understanding their negative self-beliefs, unrooting them, and then replacing them with empowering beliefs.

Now, depending on your level of self-confidence, you may not think that you have low self-worth. After all, you believe in yourself, you are generally happy, and you have a relatively positive mindset. Low self-worth doesn’t apply to me, you think.

While this may be true, the issue of low self-worth is more elusive than you may think. Just because one has a healthy level of self-confidence in general doesn’t mean that he/she is always confident. For example, the successful manager may be an unstoppable leader in the office, but suffers from low self-worth whenever he’s alone in his bathroom, staring at the reflection of his overweight self in the mirror. The happy-go-lucky lady may be joking and laughing whenever she’s out with her friends, but doubts her femininity as she’s not able to attract the kind of relationship she wants. The proud father may be the commander and steady rock of his household, but has moments of fear as he worries about his job security and ability to care for his family.

We all have moments of low self-worth, whether we are the average everyday Joe/Jane or a champion superstar like Tiger Woods, Oprah Winfrey, or Donald Trump. Rather than ignore these feelings (which you may normally do), today I’d like you to acknowledge them, and then transform these negative self-beliefs into positive ones. Now, let’s get started!

Your Task Today

  1. Identify an area of your life where you are experiencing some self-doubt now. This may be an area where you’ve felt negative about all your life. It may be an area where you didn’t feel negative about before, but you are starting to due to one negative setback after another. For example, it can be…
    • …your weight where you have been having difficulty gaining/losing weight (seems like a common issue area for many participants)
    • …your career where you can’t find a job opportunity in your desired field despite many tries
    • …romance where you have trouble finding a good partner
    • …your studies where you’re not doing as well as you wish
  2. Identify your dream vision for this area. For example:
  3. Create your affirmative belief in this area, in the form of “I deserve [dream vision].” For example:
    • Weight: “I deserve to be at my ideal weight of XX kg/pounds.”
    • Career: “I deserve to be in my dream career in field [X], doing [Y] work every day.”
    • Relationships: “I deserve to be in a loving relationship with a great guy/girl.”
    • Studies: “I deserve to be a Straight-A student and Dean’s Lister.”
  4. Say your new belief(s), along with today’s affirmation:

    “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.”

    (If you think it’s silly to say them out loud, you can say them silently in your heart.)

I encourage you to write down your new belief(s) and today’s affirmation so that you can always see them and commit them to your heart. Repeat them every day to yourself, for as many times and as long as needed, until they become part of your default thinking.

Affirmation Wallpaper: [Self-Worth]

Today’s affirmation wallpaper, for download:

Affirmation Challenge, Day 6 [Self-Worth]: "I'm worthy of love, success, and happiness."

Download (right click and save): [1920×1080] | [1600×900] | [1366×768]

Further Reading

  1. How To Be The Most Confident Person In The World – My article on how to be self-confident
  2. How to Achieve 10/10 Self-Esteem — For Life! — My two-hour breakthrough webinar about how to achieve 10/10 self-esteem… permanently. It’s a build on the key concepts that I wrote in my article, along with practical steps to apply them. Comes with audio podcast version too!

Share Your Results!

Share your results, check out other participants’ responses, and interact with each other in the comments section! Remember, this challenge is a community effort: by openly engaging in the discussion, not only will you help others, you’ll also help yourself.

If you think today’s affirmation has benefited you, do share it with your friends and family via Facebook, Twitter, G+, or e-mail.

Once you’re done, proceed to Day 7 here: Affirmation Challenge, Day 7 [Opportunities]

Images: Flower, Plant

  • ASLO

    I am loving each and every day of this challenge…it’s obviously not right to say this but I feel it with every day of this wonderful challenge that each day’s task is meant for me….I feel that each of the active participants would feel the same as I do! And I shall say this beautifully drives home the purpose of the challenge…..

    Self-worth….after realising the existence of self-love, the belief of ability of oneself, the expression of gratitude towards all I have…this is just what is needed to fit the next piece in the puzzle….I am impatiently waiting for the challenge to fold out and I feel like a small infant excited to open the next gift on his/her birthday….

    1. Identify an area of your life where you are experiencing some self-doubt now:
    To me the answer to this is obvious, I have been facing the self-doubt for quite some time now, I feel that I have been on this path of personal excellence and self-discovery for quite a while now…I wonder if I have really had any improvement in myself.

    Though my son bolsters me and tells me “Maa, you can’t see it yourself but those who’s lives you touch, can see the change” maybe his words are what I take for granted as I identified yesterday.

    2. Identify your dream vision for this area:
    What I seek to see in myself is a broad range of positive virtues and qualities.

    But to identify the biggest challenge to myself, my dream vision I’d say:

    To be accepting and forgiving and not to let my righteous nature come in way of my growth.

    3. Create your affirmative belief in this area:
    I deserve to be able to persevere at this journey of growth I have started and hence not let anyone else’s actions affect me for the worse..

    Also
    I deserve to be and feel fit and healthy

    “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness”

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      I am impatiently waiting for the challenge to fold out and I feel like a small infant excited to open the next gift on his/her birthday….

      Aw that’s such a cute analogy!! *^_^* ASLO, you make me excited to write and publish the task each day, because I know readers like you are awaiting the task and will be putting your 100% towards it!

      To me the answer to this is obvious, I have been facing the self-doubt for quite some time now, I feel that I have been on this path of personal excellence and self-discovery for quite a while now…I wonder if I have really had any improvement in myself.

      Though my son bolsters me and tells me “Maa, you can’t see it yourself but those who’s lives you touch, can see the change” maybe his words are what I take for granted as I identified yesterday.

      That’s beautiful, what your son said. I agree that sometimes we may not be able to see our own growth, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t growing. If we look back and see how far we’ve come (i.e. Day 13: Reflection of Live a Better Life in 30 Days Program), we’ll see how much we’ve grown since the past year(s)!

      That said, I see your self-questioning as a (positive) sign that your soul has evolved to a higher place, and it is currently looking for bigger “fish” to fry (i.e., it seeking to make bigger changes in your life). Perhaps it’s good to ask yourself, “What do I define as my highest vision for myself?” and “Am I realizing this vision right now?” If not, how can you realize this vision? Based on my years of coaching, I feel that this feeling of restlessness sounds like the start of something new, something grand, and I can’t wait to see how it unfolds for you!

      • ASLO

        It is metaphoric but it is what I thought portrayed best my excitement with this challenge :) It has positively moved me and I shall carry the learnings of this challenge forever in my life.

        i haven’t had a chance to purchase the 30 DLBL book as of yet, though I will do so as soon as I can manage to :)

        That is wonderful feedback from you Celes, for the words of encouragement from you as my life coach serve as wonderful motivation and just the right boost to get us rejuvenated and even more excited on this journey….
        And the tingling anticipation for something grand is melodious…it’s so close I can feel it heavy in the air…this challenge has picked on many aspects of my life that were limiting me on my path to personal excellence…you are selflessly doing a fabulous job! I wish you all the best…

    • Educate Yourself

      I do feel the same way you feel, like this is made for me.
      You said “I feel that I have been on this path of personal excellence and self-discovery for quite a while now…I wonder if I have really had any improvement in myself.” You did because you are sticking to it. If I am in doubt I know something happened. Mine is usually negative but yours is positive. It’s because the change is very small and you don’t see it right now. It’s because we can’t change overnight. But you’re improving. Pat your shoulder or give yourself a hug & a smile. :)

      • ASLO

        And it’s even more wonderful how each of the 440 or so of us positively feel the same…

        Thank you @disqus_ITs8GN9E5O:disqus, sometimes you just need another person to see it and tell you! It is a gentle reminder, a hushed whisper saying don’t stop…this is the right way forward….
        I read somewhere that if we are anticipating something wonderful and somewhere feel disappointed that it isn’t coming soon enough, then just remember it takes 6 months to build a Rolls Royce while it takes 6 hours to build a Toyota…it’s upto us for what we want….
        And I believe you too are improving! For if we all weren’t, we wouldn’t be persevering on this journey!
        Thank you for all the positivity in your message :)

        • Educate Yourself

          Thanks and you’re welcome! :)

  • Jun Xiang Tan

    Wow, this post really made me pause and think about the self-doubt I had up till now.

    Identify an area of your life where you are experiencing some self-doubt now.
    - Relationships – I never thought I had a chance in relationships even up till now. Having being arrogant and taking things for granted, I was never much loved. My parents failed relationship made me realize how devastating it has caused the family to become especially my sister. Having a failed relationship that ended quite badly had pulled me further away from being in another relationship that would cause hurt and sorrow. Finally, to the person whom I love that I expect someone better than me that would love and cherish her.

    Identify your dream vision for this area.
    - To be able to throw all my negative thoughts away to be able to give my best and cherish a serious and loving relationship with a great girl.

    Create your affirmative belief in this area, in the form of “I deserve [dream vision].”
    - I deserve to be able to put aside my issues and be in a loving relationship with a great girl!

    Say your new belief(s), along with today’s affirmation:
    - I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      Hi Jun Xiang! You sound like a great guy (based on all the comments you’ve been sharing in the challenge) and any girl will be lucky to be with you. Now that you’re working out the issues from the past, it’ll make you more ready than ever to attract the right girl. Remember that everything happens for a reason, and with the relationship that ended quite badly, it was probably not meant to be at that point in time. Keep doing what you’re doing and you never know who’s going to come your way. :D

    • Educate Yourself

      Your parents relationships are not your future. My parents divorced too. I have the flaw that separate them I think it’s an opportunity for all of us to work on it now, I hope they do so they don’t make the same mistake. They were not communicating. I don’t either but i am working on it. I am sure you will find your girl. Your sister will be fine too because she has you and you have PE. You’ll be fine.

      • Madalina S

        I have to second what you said here. A person’s parents’ relationship is in no way a blueprint for the respective person’s own relationships. After all, it is by acknowledging what their parents did wrong that they can draw lessons and valuable insights, and use those lessons and insights in order to avoid the same outcome in their lives. The past doesn’t define you (as one of the affirmations reminded us as well), either your past or your parents’, friends’, etc.

    • Vivian

      Jun xiang, my parents flight with each other, since I have memory. I saw no hope for marriage. Until I changed my mind, and create the possibility that I want relationship, and deserve a wonderful relationship I dreamed. I am in the relationship I created. We all can make it.

    • https://www.facebook.com/sanctum.beauty.full.life Santas Inspirations

      I see how this has effected you and your outlook to the world of relationships. I have a very similar story that I already shared on Day2. One thing both you and your sister must know, is that you are worthy of love. You both deserve happiness. Don’t underestimate you. Of course you have a chance for a loving relationship with a great girl!

      I am not quite sure if with ” to the person whom I love.. ” you refer to your sister or your crush, but you have to feel that you are enough, you are good enough. You have a capacity to love and you have a very caring heart and you are admitting your own faults. That’s much to offer in a relationship ;)

      In the beginning of comment you determinate some qualities that didn’t play in your favor. You can work on them. However don’t assume that you have to be perfect in order to be accepted and loved. You don’t have to change yourself for somebody else and you don’t have to compare yourself to anybody else. You only have to thrive to be your best self and love and accept yourself before expecting it from anybody else ;)

  • Lisanne Wilcox

    I deserve to be treated with respect.

    I deserve success in my work and projects.

    I deserve to be happy.

    “Everyone including yourself deserve to be in loving relationships, treated with kindness and respect. We all deserve successful careers and working relationships. Everyone deserves to be happy!”

  • Madalina S

    As I’ve mentioned in other comments, the area in which I experience the most self-doubt is that of romantic relationships. While I have no problems making friends and bonding with my parents, men intimidate me and make me doubt my looks and my personality.

    When it comes to my ideal vision in this area, I wish to be in a balanced relationship based on trust and reciprocal love and respect, with a man who is patient, lively, and open-minded.

    I deserve to be in a balanced relationship based on trust and reciprocal love and respect, with a man who is patient, lively, and open-minded.

    I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      Hey Lina, I love your affirmation! Remember that whether men accept your invitation for a coffee or not shouldn’t affect how you see yourself. For example, say someone invites you out for a coffee but you aren’t interested in him — it doesn’t mean he’s not worthy, it just means that you aren’t interested, end of story. That’s the same in the reverse situation.

      Keep working on yourself (while having an open mind and proactive attitude towards relationships); the right person will be attracted to everything about you and won’t make you doubt your looks or personality.

      • Madalina S

        Thank you, Celes!

        After reading your reply to my other comment about relationships and men, I followed the link you gave me and re-read the article about attracting authentic love. I was a tad shocked to realize that my search for love was fear-based, because I had always thought about love in terms of something I would be grateful to have,but without asking myself why I wanted it so badly. After reading that article I created a life plan (something I was totally lacking) and started a new thread in the LYBL forums. So thank you once more, Celes! :)

        • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

          Oh that is so beautiful, Lina! Sometimes our mind can only receive the lessons and ideas when it’s ready to, and it’s great that you’ve come to this revelation as it means that you’re now ready to attract and embrace a different kind of love (a love-based love!). I’ve also hopped over to PE Forums — dare I say, your new thread sounds really exciting!

          PS: For those of you who are curious, here is the thread that Lina is talking about, where she just created a life plan, including her ideal life vision and her 1-, 2-, and 5-year goals!

          • Madalina S

            Thank you, Celes!

            • https://www.facebook.com/sanctum.beauty.full.life Santas Inspirations

              Hello Madalina,

              Have you ever read Joseph Murphy books? He has really good affirmations. Actually, I believe this book helped me to attract my husband :) If you are interested I can give you information on further reading. Good luck about everything!

              • Madalina S

                Hi there :) Thank you for your suggestion!

                Yes, I am familiar with some of his books. While the message he wants to send is good, I feel uncomfortable sometimes due to the fact that he uses divine intervention and God as “keys” to success. I am a spiritual person, but not a religious one, so this is why at times I feel uncomfortable reading this kind of books.

                • https://www.facebook.com/sanctum.beauty.full.life Santas Inspirations

                  It was same for me at the beginning, as I am not Christian. Luckily Dr. Murphy doesn’t quote Bible too much, but rather tries to explain the order in Universe and some scientific information on how our brain functions. I started reading him because I was seeking for healing, as I started to read other chapters I fell in love and it became one of my all time favorite books.

                  I will copy here few affirmations that might be useful for you or any other reader. You can change them according to what’s best for you:

                  “I am now attracting a man into my experience who is honest, sincere, loyal, faithful, peaceful, happy, and prosperous. These qualities, which I admire, are sinking down into my subconscious mind now. As I dwell upon these characteristics, they become a part of me and are embodied subconsciously. know there is an irresistible law of attraction and that I attract to me a man according to my subconscious belief. I attract that which I feel to be true in my subconscious mind. I know I can contribute to his peace and happiness. He loves my ideals, and I love his ideals. He does not want to make me over; neither do I want to make him over. There is mutual love, freedom, and respect.”

                  “I now attract the right woman who is in complete accord with me. This is a spiritual union because it is divine love functioning through the personality of someone with whom I blend perfectly. I know I can give to this woman love, light, peace, and joy. I feel and believe I can make this woman’s life full, complete, and wonderful. I now decree that she possesses the following qualities and attributes: She is spiritual,
                  loyal, faithful, and true. She is harmonious, peaceful, and happy. We are irresistibly
                  attracted to each other. Only that which belongs to love, truth, and beauty can enter my experience. I accept my ideal companion now.”

                  “I am building into my mentality the type of partner I deeply desire. The person I attract for a partner is [add in characteristics you want]. We are irresistibly attracted to one another. Divine Intelligence knows where my partner is, the deeper wisdom of my subconscious mind is now bringing us together in its own way and we recognize each other immediately. I release this request to Infinite Intelligence [God] who knows what I want and how to bring it to pass. I give thanks for the perfect answer. ”

                  Joseph Murphy: “The Power of your Sub-Conscious Mind”

                  Hope it helps :)

                  PS. I suggest you seeing this video to help you understand clearer what it is that you want to find in your partner: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0ZOwMx4E2Q Would You Date Yourself? What do you want in the man (or woman) you’re going to be with? What standards do you have for them? Do you hold yourself to the same standards?

                • Madalina S

                  Thank you very much for both the quotes and the video link! :)

                • https://www.facebook.com/sanctum.beauty.full.life Santas Inspirations

                  You are welcome ;)

  • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

    Hi Alia! It’s so interesting to read about your doubt with regards to socializing and also your dream vision, because I sort of see it already happening for you — in PE! The only difference is that here on PE it’s in a virtual/online community, though there’s nothing “virtual” about this because we’re all real people, just living in different parts of the world.

    Now I’m not saying that this is the solution to your situation, but rather, if you’ve been able to meet with like-minded folks on PE and forge connections with some of us here already, that means that you already have the default skillsets, attitude, and consciousness to make this happen. The only difference now is making this happen in the offline world, and all you need to do is to transfer the thinking/attitude that has made this possible for you online, into the offline world.

    Not sure if you’ve read these before; they’ll come in handy when it comes to making meaningful, timeless connections:
    1) The Secret To Meaningful, Fulfilling Social Relationships (How To Remove Social Anxiety)
    2) 10 Useful Tips To Make New Friends
    3) How To Have More Best Friends in Life: The Heartfelt Guide

    • Alia

      Hi Celes! Thanks for responding to my comment! It’s true I do have a bit of social anxiety, and am a bit unsure of myself in social settings as opposed to online. I find I express myself more easily in the written word, plus my voice is quite soft and literally gets overpowered by others in a group setting (especially with new people). But thanks for the encouragement! I’ll keep it in mind, and will definitely check out the articles you suggested! :)

  • VickiB

    This is a good one!

    • Identify an area of your life where you are experiencing some self-doubt now.

    I’m in a good place right now! I have begun doing some things for myself that helped me get here – I started before this challenge; otherwise I probably would not be participating. The challenge is helping to further the self care and the positive changes.

    (Thank you for that, Celes!)

    But I am doubting that I will be able to continue doing these things in the long term, and even if I do, I have doubts about whether they will continue to be effective.

    For instance, one of the first days, I wrote about my insomnia. At that time, I had already begun to change a pattern related to my sleep schedule and for a few days I have been sleeping pretty well. However, I have had that happen before and it didn’t last!

    (I’m remembering the first affirmation, my past does not define me!)

    My doubts are about my ability to do self-supporting things that will continue to be effective.

    • Identify your dream vision for this area.

    My dream vision is to establish regular habits that will support my best life!

    Sleeping enough, so I feel rested.

    Eating healthy food.

    “Body motion” – I like to call it that because in much of my life, such as my work, I am sedentary, and any physical activities that I do are good for me. “Exercise” has negative connotations for me so when I put that on my to-do list, it doesn’t happen.

    Keeping my house nice, including the yard.

    Social connections. With my husband’s limitations and my own lack of energy, it is very easy to become isolated. Being with friends and family is important for my happiness and mental health.

    Work that is meaningful and enjoyable. I have that now, and it is an important thing for me to continue to have. Sometimes I feel like it is too hard or is not going well, I get discouraged and think about quitting. But things usually improve pretty quickly and I continue to enjoy what I do.

    Spending time with my husband, doing things we enjoy.

    This is my ideal life, for which I want to do self-supporting things that are effective.

    • Create your affirmative belief in this area, in the form of “I deserve [dream vision].”

    I deserve to have effective self-supporting habits and to live my best life. I can be effective in supporting myself and the life I want and deserve. I am worthy of love, success, and happiness.

    • Madalina S

      The good thing about habits is that they ARE habits. It means that they become second nature. So you shouldn’t fear relapse (although this is a reality of everyday life). However, just like it takes time to build a habit, it also takes time to lose it. So even if you don’t do something one day (something which is part of your work for acquiring a new habit), you won’t lose that habit; it doesn’t mean that you instantly regress.

      Long story short, stay strong and keep working on building good habits. Habits stick around for a long time, otherwise they wouldn’t be called habits. :) You seem a determined, strong-willed person (as far as I can tell from your comment), so I think you’ll do great.

  • Vivian

    Personally, I am a person with low self-worth. I am grateful that I have chance to access my value system, and have some realization on why I don’t have proper self-worth like others. Just as Celes shared from her coaching experience, human being just hard to have power and full in across all the circumstances. In the inner world, there is a desire to get things, there also is a voice told us that you don’t deserve that. just like a pull power and a push power happen in the same time. for me, I am aware that there are lots of little voice in my mind about the low self-worth, and I am not deserve on things I have. Now, it’s time to turn off the mental i-pod, and turn on the most beautiful music in the universe: “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.”
    Your Task Today
    A. Identify an area of your life where you are experiencing some self-doubt now. This may be an area where you’ve felt negative about all your life. It may be an area where you didn’t feel negative about before, but you are starting to due to one negative setback after another. For example, it can be…
    1) my financial freedom, I am been dream this for years, but always in struggle and compare, and feel that I won’t be able to achieve my dream. No need to have lots of belongs, materials, just want to have freedom to create things I love, support my family, and contribute to hope school, others may need that.
    2) my career. I feel that I don’t have capability to achieve my dream job, I want to be a trainer, but I always tell myself that I only can be a trainer in 20 years later. Then whatever I am doing today, is to prepare myself ready for this position. This sounds not only in unrealistic, but also hurt my confidence, which means most of things doing today are meaningless.
    3) My study. I have dream to get master degree, PhD if possible as well. I enrolled in the study since 2009, failed 2 times the in the national exam. On my hand, I wish I can pass then exam, then I can prepare the paper. On the other hand, I wish I fail in the exam. Then I will stop this journey. At the same time, I also think about lots of what’s if, what’s if I took the exam right after I deliver baby, what if I choose other program to enroll….
    Identify your dream vision for this area. For example: (copy some from my personal mission statement )
    1) Myself: I am the best friend of myself, love myself and enable myself to reach my full potential.
    2) Weight: To be at my ideal weight of 50 kg. This really works, I used to dream to be 55KG right after baby deliver, it took 2 years for my dream come true.
    3) My career: To be in my dream career in L&D field, which I will have chance to make a difference to people and org everyday. Create a platform to get others involved to contribute to the world. I will strive to be the best possible professional that I can be. I will constantly engage myself in learning and improving myself. No matter where I work, I will build solid professional relationships with my co-workers, customers and suppliers because they trust me. I will leave positive footprints in everything I do. I will make a difference in all my endeavors and interactions. Finally I will open an university, invite famous people to teach the student how to be ready for the future job, teach others, go around the world, volunteer to Africa, go to Japan for Jerome Tomb, teaching others, have my own tea house, quality space .
    4) Wife: I will accept and empower my husband I will work hard to ensure that we grow and journey through life together. I will maintain a close communication with him, will end each day on a positive message with him (even if we fight). Together with my husband, we will build a home that will be the best place on earth for us. I am the cause of the happy and full of self expression marriage.
    5) Daughter: I will exercise filial duty. I am what am today because of the sacrifices that my parents have done for me. I want to express my sincerest appreciation for their unconditional love and care by taking good care of them. I will ensure they are well provided for and that they will enjoy their golden years. If I can see this happen, I would have fulfilled this part of my mission.
    6) Finance: To have financial freedom, to have chance to support my family for the life they wanted, to enable myself further study and add value to society, to donate/contribute to NGO.
    7) Mother: to be a supportive mother, give unconditionally love to my son. I will be partner in the lives of my children. I will give him the best possible upbringing and education that I am capable of giving. I will work hard-in-hand in my husband to help our son grow to be the best person he is capable of being. I will be a friend at various stages in his life. I will encourage him to explore things without a lot of restrictions. I will let him define success and let him live the lives that he wants and choose, accept the way he is, accept the way he isn’t with my unconditional love.
    8) Sister: I will be there for my brothers and sister whenever they need my help. I will strive to maintain a close relationship even if we are all living different lives. I will find ways to get the family together.
    9) Friends: I will maintain a strong circle of friends; I will help them without expecting anything in return. I will get satisfaction knowing that I have contributed to them. I will be thoughtful and will remember constantly to work nurturing the relationship that I have.
    Create your affirmative belief in this area, in the form of “I deserve [dream vision].”
    1) Weight: “I deserve to be at my ideal weight of 55 kg.”
    2) Career: “I deserve to be in my dream career in L&D field, make a difference to talent and org.
    3) Writer: I deserve to be a great writer, and make a difference to my reader across times.
    4) Studies: “I deserve to be a master in psychology.”
    5) Financial: I deserve to have financial freedom, because I create the value to the world.
    Say your new belief(s), along with today’s affirmation:
    “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.”
    Here is the link for day 6: http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_a2fd0f5f0102ux4n.html

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      Hi Vivian, those are very powerful affirmations that you’ve created for yourself! I’m really glad that you’re doing such a deep dive to identify areas of self-doubt and addressing them one by one. It’s normal to have self-doubt in various areas of our lives, and it’s more important that we acknowledge them and dig out their root causes than sweep them under the rug and pretend that they don’t exist. You’re doing exactly the former and working through those feelings, which will help you to achieve a sustainable self-esteem.

      Regarding low-self-worth, I’m not sure if you’ve the How to Achieve 10/10 Self-Esteem webinar? If not, I highly recommend that you check it out. It’s my two-hour deep-dive webinar where I drill down to the root cause of all self-esteem/self-worth issues (and there is in fact one common cause that binds all low-self-esteem issues, despite the diversity of human problems) and share the steps to achieving 10/10 self-esteem, permanently. I feel like you’re breaking through self-limiting thoughts so speedily in this challenge and this webinar may well provide that tipping point to push you to your next level. (Not trying to promote it because it’s my product, but because I know I can endorse the lessons I teach inside and I really believe that it’s going to make the make-or-break difference.)

    • Educate Yourself

      I feel selfish now after reading you. You have your dreams & +++.
      Do you think it’s a waste if, say you wrote a book and it benefited one soul? I see you’re like me you have so many dreams. I was in a dilemma because i was doubting myself. I have been in college too long because i fail a lot. So I felt like I can’t donate to any of the places i want to donate. i now believe I don’t have to make it big to do it. You don’t have to be rich to donate. I complicated my life. i now use what I have. I get letters from charity causes and they have a paper for suggestions where you check off what you’re going to give example $ 35, $45, $100…
      I take I only use the envelope because I need the address with a $5 -$20 in it and stamped it. Because I had “what ifs” thoughts. Like, “what if I die young before I made my dreams come true?”, “What if I graduate and get the job and have so many responsibilities, I won’t be able to give what i planned to give?” “Or what if I don’t get hired after I graduate” you see that so much these days. Or even if I finish my studies and get the job what if $…K the job described us in college is not what I am going to get?” If you want to contribute to society just use what you can spare now.

      By the way, your dream # 3 came true. “Writer: I deserve to be a great writer, and make a difference to my reader across times.” You are a great writer. I got hit by many of your bullets. Thanks a lot!

      My mom said I think negative. I love what you said here “Now, it’s time to turn off the mental i-pod, and turn on the most beautiful music in the universe: “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.”” Among other things.

      I think you’re are a success because I didn’t want to get married and have kids while studying. But you did it! I am inspired. Thank you for sharing. I don’t share those. I cut and paste from my virtual diary what I am comfortable to share. Too late now.

      • Vivian

        Wow, educate yourself, thanks for your comments.
        1.for writing, i believe words have soul and will live longer than me. Even if only one soul will be touched, there is the difference make for that individual. And he/she can make a difference to others.
        2.i did give some I can do company hope school, but I want to give more. I used to enjoy where I was, but I want to get certain position becasue that will help more people.
        3.I am doing part time study, had baby after I worked a few years. I do believe having children is a personalchoices.and mother isthe most important person in the world.
        4. Love your encouagement on writer. Glad you like it. I will continue my journey. Thanks.

        • Educate Yourself

          You’re welcome. We are here for each other. :)

  • Educate Yourself

    Wow great timing. I was thinking a lot about love. I was always on one sided relationships I call them “relation shit” I heard it on one of Eminem’s songs and I like it. Right now I am in love with my best friend, he is not into it. But the “Friendship” is killing me. I want to end it but I don’t want to hurt him and our parents are pushing us wanting more out of it. Which is pissing me off. I am feeling like I am being forced to be his friend. He is a great man but I don’t know how to tell him without hurting him. I really hope he meets his soul mate by accident and marry her so I can be free. I don’t feel like I lost him to her because we are friends. He will always be with me even if we stop talking. I would hate it if my man has a woman best friend paying attention to her. His wife will take over but he will always be in my heart. How do I tell him to go date, he is not, without being misunderstood? Whenever I tell people my thoughts I am misunderstood. So I will keep it to myself. And leave it to God. I don’t want him to think I have a hidden agenda. I do not. I want to be in a real relationship but I refuse the men who are interested in me because I feel happy right now and he is not my boyfriend. I am lying to myself calling it “friendship” but I am scared I may have said no to my soul mate. Yesterday a guy asked me out again and I refused again! I am thinking of joining an Islamic dating agency. I don’t date. If I pay with my own money I won’t waste it. Like exercising, it’s free in college but I never went. I joined martial arts so I can kill two birds with one stone (exercise and doing a childhood dream). I will date whoever they chose for me. There is one condition. They have to be Muslims. I don’t have a list, I have my own flaws too. I just want to get married. I am almost 28. And I never dated. I was okay by myself but my parents want a son in law and I falling hard for kids lately. When I see them I want one.

    1. Identify an area of your life where you are experiencing some self-doubt
    -I am doubting about my soul mate. Before I fell for my best friend I liked a classmate for 14 years. So lonely, it was one sided. Call me crazy I had an imaginary friend since I was a kid and I found out by accident that I was in love with him. I kept lying to myself that I liked my old classmate instead. I feel like I am destined to be forever alone. I don’t mind it but I mind it. I was conformable alone at first for years but now i want more.
    - I was not doing well in my studies. I am scared now because I was getting better but my best friend moved in my head now there no space for me to think. All I think about is his cute teddy bear face. He calls himself “fat boy” and is forcing himself to lose the weight being vegan. It’s working. And he is still cute! I lied to him. I said he looked “good” but he looked scary handsome. He wants to be “lean and muscular”. I have to force myself while thinking about him and study. I have a midterm tomorrow, And I am scared.

    2. Identify your dream vision for this area.
    -I thought I was crazy when I finally accept that I liked an imaginary man, I think it’s my loneliness that did that. And I am hoping if I do have a soul mate that it’s him, my imaginary man. I named him “Medhi”. I believe that I will see him in real life someday. But I really want my best friend. If I have a soul mate it has to be Medhi but it scares me that he doesn’t exist and I might be disappointed in my real soul mate. Medhi is my dream vision. Or else, I need therapy.
    - I want to be on the Dean’s list.

    3. Create your affirmative belief in this area, in the form of “I deserve [dream vision].”
    -I Deserve a soul mate, believe that everyone has one. Because I was made with my soul mate’s rib bone. He better exist or else!
    -I deserve that satisfaction about being a good student always getting As.

    4. Say your new belief(s), along with today’s affirmation:
    -God I know my soul mate is somewhere out there looking for me too!
    -I am going to be on the Dean’s list. I believe in myself. If I can beat my worst enemy, me, I can force myself to do this.
    “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.”

    • ASLO

      Reading your comment has moved me! i am not saying that in pity for no one deserves pity…they deserve compassion and blessing that they shall get the best for them, for they deserve the best!

      From my 44 years, I have learnt one thing, and many will say this to you, you probably believe in it yourself and when someone would say it to you, you’d find it cliched and perhaps annoying…but every wrong turn has a right reason….if we weren’t meant to be in the situation we are in, we wouldn’t have been there….it seems hard to see it when something happens to us, but pondering later on shows that it was the right thing…

      And I do hope and send a prayer in my heart to you that you find your soul mate, your Medhi, but I believe that he’d be even better than Medhi….and when someone else believes that you’ll receive the best….you definitely will….godspeed!

      (It may seem some of the things I have said dwell much on mythical beliefs but honestly I know you will have have the best for yourself….for you deserve the best!)

      I feel the same way too when you say “Whenever I tell people my thoughts I am misunderstood. So I will keep it to myself. And leave it to God” I feel the same but sometimes wonder if I leave the thoughts in myself, they choke in me from the inside…

      • Educate Yourself

        You said you feel the same way about your thoughts, “they choke in me from the inside…” there was this idea from the super better game that you should write when you’re angry. Or you can write it in your journal. I prefer the angry idea. I read what I wrote later and think “wow”. Maybe that’s why people advise you to keep quiet when you’re angry until you cool off, because you can’t take it back once it gets out. Try it and see.

        • ASLO

          That is a lovely idea! I’m sure it will help me get more directed and calm with my thoughts! I’ll try it out and get back to you :) x

  • Educate Yourself

    I have social troubles too. You can join a Toastmasters club near you. Toastmaster is a public speaking club. I did join. I had to stop going though for a while but I am going back in August.The people are friendly and don’t judge you and they are very supportive. I won’t lie to you, It’s going to be hard. I freeze when i had to talk and I am always nervous and it showed. i don’t know how they hide it but they told me they are nervous too, all the time. Good luck! You can do it.

    • Alia

      Thanks so much! I’m not sure if my country has a regular Toastmasters club but I’ll look into it. To be honest, it’s a bit of a leap out of my comfort zone since I’m deathly afraid of public speaking, however, I’ll keep it in mind :)

  • Educate Yourself

    “When I deliberately ignore this lack and choose to focus on what i do have (ie yesterday’s gratitude challenge), my upset disappears. I feel happier and my EE disappears, because I feel fulfilled in this very moment.” Keep doing it! So you can be happy 365 days a year. :)

  • Educate Yourself

    Let’s say you and me are applying for your dream job. I am just doing it for the money and we both knew that because i had told you before the interview in the waiting area. We were both nervous and trying to appear stronger than we were I was annoying you with small talks.(Happen to me at an interview, I just wanted her to shut up!) So we go in and are being interviewed together. The interviewer asks us a question “who do you think I should hire?” Will you say hire her? she … while “I am not good enough”?

    Not related to the imagination above but who do you think is the most important person right now? Think about it. It’s not who you think. If you think the way I did, you fail. The most important person right now, it’s someone only you know. Nobody knows this person better than you. I will give you hints. Then I will tell you. Nobody knows what this person had for breakfast this morning. Did that person ate, nobody knows it but you. You also know this person’s secrets. You know this person’s shoe size. No it’s not you sister/brother and definitely not your best friend or confident. You know what this person likes and dislikes. It’s not the president, your #1 mom/dad. It’s not a boyfriend/girlfriend. It’s not your grand parents. It’s you. Simple you. You’re the most important person in the whole world. There is nobody like you, God made sure of that. There is only one you. You’re unique, but you forget that.

    It doesn’t matter how many “intelligent minds” there are out there. If I say Infinity. You can beat me and say “Infinity plus one”. It’s the same thing with people. Just because they are here doesn’t mean you won’t make it too. You will.

    You must tell the interviewer to hire you. He/she obviously knows you’re passionate about NET JRF topper because he/she knows I am only there for the pay based on my answers/question because you were so into it you forgot to ask the pay. He/she knows you don’t care about the pay like I do, she/he just want to see if you believe in yourself and will give you the job because they need someone confident. You’re missing from the company!

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      Educate Yourself, you’re crazy (and I mean it in a positive way) positive, empowering, and inspiring. I don’t need anyone’s affirmation comments to know that your comments are making a difference here in this challenge (at the very least, they are to me). Thank you so much for being a shining light in this challenge and encouraging the other participants, ON TOP OF openly sharing yourself too! You are a true gem.

      PS: Have you ever considered a career in the lines of helping others / self-help / self-empowerment, or at least an adjacent career (as I know you’re currently studying engineering)? I think you have it in you to excel in such a field, and I feel that it’s more than just your skillsets talking too — there’s a natural fire burning inside you that not everyone can have.

      • Educate Yourself

        You just made my day! I do want to help people with my ideas only not like you. That’s why I can’t quit engineering, the engineering department and my family told me to leave it because I started to crash after I started taking the main stuff (math is a pain in my neck). I had to repeat a lot to pass them.
        When I was a kid I got electrocuted and I want to make safety systems because of that. Yes I am studying electrical engineering… Thanks so much, I will remember this!!!!

  • rosetta

    Want to say I am so grateful for technology….thank you Celes. I feel like a new person is coming out of me! Thank you so much .

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      I’m so happy to hear that rosetta! Thanks for being a part of this challenge! :D Feel free to share your results for the daily task too!

  • Jenny D

    I am experiencing self doubt with my weight. I know many people like me for who I am and not my weight. However, to me how I got to this weight and where I am at with my weight, I would like to get rid of. My ideal weight is 149. However, I am satisfied with being healthy at 168, which is considered normal at the doctor’s office. I also deserve to be strong and healthy. Now I need to apply this to be habit of night time binge eating.
    “I’m worthy of love, success, and happiness.”

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      Hi Jenny! Self-doubt regarding weight is something that many experience (including myself in the past, and also including other participants here), so you’re definitely not alone. Have you read my emotional eating series before? If not, I recommend checking it out, as I go into a deep dive on my past ee issues (including severe night time binge eating habits) and how I worked through them. (How to Stop Stress Eating is my one-stop four-module program to overcome stress eating for life, and it really blows the whole issue wide open.)

      The most important thing here is that you’re at the weight/physique you’re happy with, and if your ideal weight is 149 (assuming it’s a healthy weight), then it’s something to work towards with healthy eating and fitness practices. You totally deserve to be strong, healthy, and at a weight/physique you’re happy with, and it’s simply about taking the right steps to make them happen!

  • 家梅 李

    I experience 2 areas of self-doubt:
    1. My weight that makes me hard to get nice dresses. As mentioned in the earlier tasks, I wish to reduce my weight, and I’m working on it now. :)
    2. Communication between me and my boyfriend. I always think beyond the real situations. For example, when both of us sit together, I afraid that he may get hot because of the hot weather. He is a person who sweat a lot. So, I keep a distance with him, although deep in my heart, I wish to sit closer to him as long as possible. Whereas from his perspective, he thought that I didn’t want to get closer to him because of sweating. What a funny joke between a couple. Haha. After expressing my thoughts, the problem resolved. He always ask me not to over-think about how he feels. Just do whatever I wish, and he will let me know if he doesn’t like it.

    My ideal weight is supposed to be reducing 20kg. But, currently I set my target to be 5kg for now. I wish that I can make it in this coming December. It could be not much weight reduced, but it is still a hard achievement for me throughout the years. I know, I deserve to have the ideal weight one day, and fit into my favorite dresses.

    For my romantic relationship, I would say, I’m learning to communicate with him. We tend to have common topics for chatting. But, when come to personal thoughts, I think we have a gap. I’m a conservative girl, while he is more towards open-minded guy. I’m still learning to adapt into his mindset while not losing my own identities and principles. I know I can make it as we communicate a lot. I deserve to be in a healthy relationship. :)

    • Samuel Lim

      Hi Mei Li, 各花入各眼. What I found helped me when starting to exercise was to make it very easy (running 1 round), then slowly build up from there. Running 1 round at first won’t help you to lose weight, but it ensures that you will keep running everyday until you can slowly increase the intensity of exercise.

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      Jaleen, that is actually a really funny exchange between you and your boyfriend! I personally think it’s so sweet and reflects how much both of you cares about each other. :)

      On weight loss, it’s awesome that you are setting clear goals and taking action on them. I look forward to seeing you embark on your goals and excelling in them (I’ve no doubt that you will!). At the same time I also want to let you know not to pressurize yourself too much on hitting an X target, and to focus on enjoying the process. I.e., enjoying being fit for the sake of being healthy, enjoying cooking healthy meals, enjoying eating healthy food, and at the same time, celebrating your body as it currently is (ideal weight or not).

      Reason why I mentioned that is because in module three of How to Stop Stress Eating Program, I cover a critical aspect of weight loss / emotional eating (that most do not realize) where our physical weight isn’t so much the summation of the food and exercises we do but simply an expression of our spiritual selves. You may have heard about people who are severely overweight trying very hard to lose weight. Some do, some don’t, but many eventually bounce back to their original weight regardless of how hard they tried to prevent that. The reason isn’t lack of discipline or McDonald’s, but that they’re carrying baggage which prevents them from losing the weight; i.e. their physical bodies is simply an expression of what’s on the inside. It’s quite a deep concept that I share more in the course, but the bottom line is that the path to successful weight loss (at least the spiritual aspect) includes first embracing and loving our bodies as they are (and how lovely we look in our current clothes!), which will then pave the way for our “ideal” bodies to emerge!

  • Renu Seth

    I have been having a lurking sense of self doubt for standing by friends/ or participating in certain events in their lives – while a larger circle of people/ may not appreciate this participation. And, at some time, even i was in self doubt. On going through it again in my mind, talking with people important to me, i could help myself – on bigger questions like, what will you answer when you are asked uncomfortable questions? what if you are isolated in taking this stand? ( its not easy, i can tell you!)We also thought of what is important in our relationships, what are the values we uphold? What are the areas/ or limitations of the situation ? What is a realistic view? And we could participate with pretty much clear thoughts. I deserved to have the ownership to take a decision , to believe in what is important for me. I am aware of the repercussions – and i deserve to be allowed to have my opinion.. I deserve to develop myself as a person with compassion and being fair. I deserve to respect people who may not agree with me. I’ll work on being worthy of love success and happiness… To feel okay with oneself, keeps one going..

  • Hanna Sharpe

    1. Area of self-doubt for me:
    Romance – having had many disappointing relationships in the past.

    2. My dream vision for this area:
    To be in a loving relationship with a wonderful man.

    3.Affirmative belief:
    I deserve to be in a loving relationship with a wonderful man.

  • Vinay Kumar

    An area of my life where I’m experiencing self-doubt now – relationship. I’ve been in a couple of relationships which didn’t work out. Although they didn’t work out, they left me a better person – thanks to the wonderful girls I was with. We just discovered we were different people and looking for different things in life. If
    anything, my exes made my self-worth increase.

    Now that I’m looking for a new relationship (since an year), I’m wondering where to ‘stop’. I’m generally an accepting person and I see the beauty in almost every other person. So it’s hard for me to say ‘no’ to someone else. But I also do not want to take things forward if I don’t feel like it. Sometimes I wonder if I’m being too choosy. In the past one year I’ve already said no to over 10 girls, two of whom I dated for around two months each.

    Dream vision: I’ll find my partner who’s kind, honest, broad-minded and loving. Someone who could be a lovely companion but at the same time who’s also her own individual. And someone who’s intelligent and mature. Someone whom when I meet, I can’t help but see that she’s the one :)

    I deserve to be with a great partner. I deserve all the love, happiness, and success that I deserve!

    • http://personalexcellence.co/ Celestine Chua

      Hi Vinay, yes you do deserve all the love, happiness, and success *in the world*!!! I’m actually very happy for you that you have gained such positive lessons from your past relationships, even if they didn’t work out! Many people feel sorrow from relationships that broke off; some even feel bitterness and hate at their exes. However, you’re able to gain positive lessons and even gain a higher self-worth from them, which speaks a lot about your wisdom and consciousness!

      • Vinay Kumar

        Thank you Celes :). I’ve also been fortunate to have been in relationships with two wonderful girls! And being with them I’ve realized that I can be a good partner. I’d a lot of self-worth issues many years ago. My first ex helped me overcome most of them. I’m still friends with both my exes.

        • Educate Yourself

          Wow, your exes are your friends? :)

          • Vinay Kumar

            Yes :). I’d a good breakups where we had long chats. I believe in having breakups where nothing is left unsaid and nothing unheard. If you move out of it having no baggage from it, having understood their side of the story fully, and having expressed your side, I think it’s possible to not harbor any ill-feelings towards your exes.

            Of course, the other person too would need to be equally open to completely resolve things – to have those long chats.

            If relationships were like jobs, I could give my exes references to my next partner, being confident that they’ll say only good things about me ;)

            • https://www.facebook.com/sanctum.beauty.full.life Santas Inspirations

              Wow Vinay ;) Great perspective.
              Can’t wait for a challenge about relationships ;)

              • Vinay Kumar

                Ha ha Santas Inspirations … as long as a relationship challenge isn’t about getting into one in 15 days ;)

  • Karen

    In my life now, I experience self-doubt in a couple places: my weight and my relationship.

    I would like to be roughly 120lbs, as was suggested by my doctor as a healthy weight for my height. However, I intend to focus mostly on being happy and healthy, weight loss or no weight loss.

    In terms of my relationship, I need to conquer my anxiety and reach deep down to touch upon my root issues. I am just discovering that it is never simply a surface level problem, it is almost always something deeper down that I need to address.

    My affirmations: I deserve to be healthy and not miserable over my health in the future like some people I know in my life.

    I owe it to myself to be happy in my relationship and sort out the root issues that are causing problems on my end. I know that when I am not at 100%, my own relationship with my partner suffers. I deserve to be at peace with myself.

    I am worthy of love, success, and happiness (and good health!)!

  • Jacqueline

    My weight has always been an issue. As you said it can come from childhood. I was always told I was fat and unworthy by my brothers. At 16 I was 3 months pregnant and weighed in at 118lbs. Definitely not fat! I am now at 182 (at 51 yrs old). This is mostly due to health issues and medicines that I am taking. I am a fighter. I do deserve to be at 140lbs! I am worth of love, success, and happiness.

  • http://hackmyheart.com/ Calae

    I gave this task more thought, and I discovered the simple reason beneath this thought: I’m allowing people’s opinions of me to represent my worth! While the reason is simple, the solution isn’t quite as easy. I’ve now had two embarrassing experiences just a day apart that are really testing me, so I’m still figuring out how to actually not *feel* the influence of people’s opinions of me. My blog post has been updated to reflect my further findings. =)

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