Kindness Challenge Day 5: Give a Genuine Compliment to at Least 3 People

This is Day 5 of the 14-Day Kindness Challenge for Nov 2012 where hundreds of participants from around the world get together in spirit to do 14 acts of kindness over 14 days. The challenge is now over, but you can still do the tasks in your own time. Visit the overview page for all Kindness Challenge tasks and posts.

Join the Kindness Challenge!

Hello everyone! :D Welcome to Day 5 of the 14-Day Kindness Challenge! :D

Our Kindness Tasks So Far!

Check out the five kindness tasks assigned so far (Days 0–4) as well as the awesome results reported by the participants!! :D

You guys are really going all out in executing the kindness tasks and I’m so, SO proud of all of you. :D

For example, there’s participant Hendro who went and signed up as a voluntary member at Singapore Art Museum yesterday due to Day 4′s task on signing up for volunteer work. There’s participant Chestnut who gamely signed up to volunteer for one entire month in Africa. There’s participant Qin Tang (check out her blog On My Mind) who wrote five thank-you notes as a result of Day 3′s task to write thank-you notes—and that’s two more notes than the assigned three notes! And many many more.

You guys are awesome. AWESOME. Thank you so much for being you. :D We are making such big waves in others’ lives through our Kindness Challenge! Let’s continue to rock this! :D

My Day 4 Review: Volunteer Work

Day 4′s task was to Sign Up For Volunteer Work (On Top of Whatever You Have Been Doing).

As I had mentioned in Day 4′s post, I have been thinking of volunteering at the SPCA—Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. I thought, “Hey, since I’m doing the Kindness Challenge, might as well take this chance to sign up for SPCA!” So, I did!

Volunteer page at SPCA

The SPCA (Singapore) website volunteer section.

I surfed over to SPCA’s site, then entered the volunteer section. As I looked for the instructions to register as a volunteer, I saw the prerequisites to be a volunteer: (a) must be at least 17 years of age, which I qualify (I’m 28 this year), (b) able to commit for at least 4 months consecutively on a weekly or fortnightly basis.

When I saw the second criteria, I thought, “Bum!!!” I was thinking of a lighter engagement as my busy schedule does make it hard for me to invest that much time in anything else.

However, no sooner did that thought disappear, for I told myself that I really should be more committed to my desire to volunteer at the shelter. So what if it’s a commitment of at least four months? I’ll just make it work out then. It’s all in the name of a good cause.

My Volunteer E-mail to SPCA

My e-mail to the SPCA community

So there! I sent out my e-mail to the SPCA team, and will await their response over the next few days. I’m a little curious as to how this stint will turn out as this is my first time volunteering at an animal shelter—who knows, I might well blog about my experience at PE, since much of my material is based on my real life experiences. We’ll see. Stay tuned guys. :D

Update Nov 5 (Day 5): Jaclyn the volunteer coordinator at SPCA has reverted! She sent me the member form which I need to fill in, after which I would be booked into a member orientation session (about 1.5 hours) which will determine if I will get selected for the volunteer work program. They even said that they have “overwhelming” applications and may take some time to revert. Uh, okay. o_O Nice to know that there are many people who offer to volunteer at the shelter.

I’ll be filling up and submitting the member form this week, and anticipate attending the next orientation session (they hold them once every month). Will update my progress in time on the blog.

Update Nov 9 (Day 9): Have filled in the volunteer form and sent it in to Jaclyn. Will await her response and confirmation, thereafter I should be sent on the next available orientation session (held once a month). I should be able to start my volunteer work thereafter. :D

Day 5: Compliments

Compliment and Praise

 Do you give compliments to others?

In the article Are You Emotionally Generous?, I talked about the importance of being emotionally generous to others. Giving compliments, genuine compliments, is precisely an act of emotional generosity to others.

Some people might confuse giving compliments with giving thank yous, which was the task for Day 3. To differentiate between the two, compliment means recognizing something positive about a person and giving praise for it, while the thank-you is about expressing appreciation and gratitude, for something the person did to you or for you before.

An example of a compliment would be telling the person that he/she looks great today (if that is indeed what you feel), while an example of a thank-you would be thanking the person for being there for you when you were down a week ago.

Your task today is to give people a genuine compliment!

Your Task: Give a Genuine Compliment to at Least 3 People

Level 1 Task: Give a Genuine Compliment to One Person

Pick one person, any person, to give a genuine compliment to.

Level 2 Task: Give Genuine Compliments to at Least Three People

Give a genuine compliment to at least three people. Think you can do that? I think you can! :) In fact, the more people, the better!! 

Share Your Results!

How many people did you give genuine compliments to today? What did you compliment them on? How did they respond to your compliments? :)

Check out the responses of other participants in the comments section!

After you are done with Day 5, proceed to Day 6: Talk to Someone You Don’t Normally Talk To.

Image: agingdragqueen

  • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

    I’ve given genuine compliments to five people so far today. :D Two of them was live on air in fact—I did it during my radio segment with Kiss92 today and gave genuine compliments to deejays and co-hosts Maddy and Arnold. As for the rest, two were delivered through whatsapp, and another delivered through Twitter (refer to my comment to Wanxuan).

    Will see if I have opportunities to drop a few more genuine compliments before the day ends. :D

    • hendro

      Hello Celes

      So great to hear your energetic voice and sharing on kiss 92 FM today (eventhough the Kiss 92 FM radio app inside my smart phone did not work so well when I was inside the train :( ). Hope I could get to listen the recording from your blog or other channels for today sharing. Anyway, I really liked the way you complimented Maddy and Arnold :clap:

      Hope you will remain the show to share more great and positive things with the listeners. :bow: You are doing awesome job during the show! :) All the best :dance:

      Cheers

      Hendro

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Ok, final count: 8 people for yesterday! :D And these are instances where I went out to intentionally compliment. I’ve not counted the compliments I issue on a normal, regular basis, as these would be part of my usual behavior and not part of Kindness Challenge. More of my updates for Day 5 at Day 6′s post: http://personalexcellence.co/blog/kindness-day-6-talk-to-someone/

  • Sonah

    For the week-end I was invited to a marriage ceremony, at the place of a friend.He was so nice and hospitable that all the guests who turned up, most of them, said that it was perfect organisation, with consideration in the minutest detail, regarding the convenience and comfort of the guest. Add to it good food, light entertainment programme, and a religious respect of time, you come back with the feeling that you never or rarely have such enjoyable time. I therefore decided that I should personally compliment the family in writing, in the context of the kindness challenge. Kindness is to do and say the nicest thing in the nicest way.
    My friend was so moved by the compliment note,simple sincere,and without exaggeration, please, that he phoned me and called on me immediately after.I had never seen such a happy man, so full of gratitude.
    Infact He had requested me to say a few words on that grand occasion for the newly married couple. He seemed to have been so delighted that he wanted to share his feelings at the earliest. And when he received my note,it was too much.
    kindness breed kindness. Kindness shared is kindness enhanced.

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Aw, that’s really kind of you to thank your friend by way of a personal note, in writing! It sounds like he was really warmed by your note too judging from the response. Great job Sonah. :clap:

      PS: By the way, it sounds like your act of kindness is more a thank-you note task, which is what we did on Day 3, than a compliment task. For the participants who are unclear, compliment means finding something positive to give praise to the person for, while the thank-you ask is about expressing appreciation, gratitude, for something the person did to you or for you before.

  • http://www.cheap-cell-phones-guide.com Wanxuan

    I have given genuine compliments to 3 people so far :) I will continue to look for the good in people :) :angel:

    • http://www.cheap-cell-phones-guide.com wanxuan

      Btw, my mum also complimented me twice today. I feel we should compliment people around even more. A compliment can just make someone’s day, just like it did to me! :D

      • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

        Aw, that’s really beautiful! :D What did your mom compliment you on, Wanxuan?

        PS: I dropped you a genuine compliment earlier today too! Not sure if you caught it on twitter:
        https://twitter.com/celestinechua/status/265339698250141696
        https://twitter.com/celestinechua/status/265339711067926528

        • http://www.cheap-cell-phones-guide.com wanxuan

          My mum was rushing out of the house for a facial and I went into the bedroom and realised the phone she was charging was still there.. so I called her before she entered the lift. Luckily she heard me and retrieved her phone. She said “Great that you found my phone was still in the house!” Can’t survive without a phone these days LOL!

          Also, being a new vegetarian, I tried making veg kut teh today (for non-Singaporeans, it is a kind of herbal soup usually made of pork but I made it vegetarian with tofu/shrooms instead) and she (non-vegetarian) said it was actually not bad :D

          I just saw your twitter link in PE comment here! Guess I don’t check my twitter “connect” tab often enough oops. Awww thank you!! I feel very very touched :D You are very caring too.. Not many bloggers actually respond to readers’ comments personally like you do! :love: You made my day too :angel:

          • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

            Wanxuan, thank you so much for your kind words. :love: :love: This whole kindness challenge and gratitude expression is making me feel so warm and fuzzy inside. :heart: At the same time I feel so happy to see you having all these wonderful experiences with your mom in the past few days, since the start of the challenge!

          • Hetal_S

            I completely agree with below point :) :

            You are very caring too.. Not many bloggers actually respond to readers’ comments personally like you do!

  • hendro

    Hello Everyone

    I felt so great about doing this challenge by end of day eventhough after having a long day today.

    Yay!!! I completed the mission for today again ie to give compliments for at least 3 ppl. :D

    While listening to Kiss 92 FM radio inside the train (When Celes shared about how to overcome procrastination), I came to know of today challenge without looking through my email :)

    I have sent compliment to
    1. Dolly (One of the kindness movement challenge participant as well :D – for being so active in her sharing during webinar as well as words of encourangement from her)
    2. Celes ( For doing great job during Kiss 92 FM in sharing about procrastination)
    3. For ppl (who have post 2 likes for my comment of day 4 challenge)
    4. Compliment feedback form for the workshop I attended last week.

    Hope all of you have great time today as well.

    Cheers

    Hendro

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Aw, thanks for your compliment Hendro!! :love: :love: You made my day. I was actually worried that I didn’t do a good job for today’s segment, as I didn’t feel that I gave enough examples to listeners on how to overcome procrastination (partly due to time limitations; you only get so much time on air). I hope the listeners got some good takeaways from the segment; as for the rest who didn’t, I hope they surfed over to PE to check out the free e-book and read he advice inside. :D

      Thanks again Hendro for listening to the segment and your constant support. :) I really appreciate it!

      • hendro

        You are most welcome Celes. :D No worries, there are always rooms for to get improvement for everything that we are doing. :dance: Just suggestion, If you have more to share about the procrastination, perhaps you can discuss with DJ hosts to have another segments or shows to share more about how to tackle procrastination (part 3, part 4 and etc.) . :p Hope you always enjoy sharing and spreading your positivity and enthusiasm to more needy people. :angel:

        Cheers

        Hendro

        • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

          Hey Hendro, I would love to share as much as I can (in fact I wouldn’t even mind a multiple segment series on procrastination or any topic) but there is limited time on air and also different objectives for DJs/producers/management who may want to discuss a variety of personal excellence topics than stick to just one, since the listeners are very varied. Just a multitude of considerations to be factored in.

          Thanks a lot for your ongoing support! I really appreciate it. :D And great job on the kindness challenge too! I’ve been very impressed by your participation and daily results you have been sharing in the posts! :D

  • Daria

    For today’s task, I gave my parents a genuine compliment each and one to my friend.

    (Just a note before beginning the details of my results … I think that *sometimes* untrue compliments do more harm than good, and probably constructive criticism in that case would be better!)

    During the regular walking exercise I do with my father, there came a moment when I was actually having trouble keeping up with him and this was a very different thing than the usual. His stamina was improving and I commented about it and he laughed and then his speed increased even more! :dance:

    And later in the day, I admired mom’s new healthy habit (drinking unsweetened green tea), it’s great especially that mom is used to black tea. She was drinking her tea and occupied with something but she did look up and gave me a bright smile! :)

    And lastly, a compliment to my friend on her kindness and pureness of heart. She replied with a better compliment and it lifted my spirits even more :D

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Daria, how beautiful that you complimented your parents. Most of us (myself included) would go for the easy route out of complimenting people we normally already see and talk to on a regular basis. It’s a whole different ball game to compliment our parents.

      You have inspired me to do so myself. I’m going to drop a compliment to my dad and mom each later today. :D Thank you for the inspiration, Daria!

      • Bob

        I agree giving compliments to parents and people we don’t normally do opens up new horizons. It shows we recognise them and opens up the channels of communication wider. I think it also helps to change our fixed beliefs on how they act and interact with us and others. By complimenting we are showing we appreciate certain characteristics, which helps them to change their own image (and beliefs) of themselves because they have a new highlight or point of focus.

        P.S. Celes your compliments on Kiss 92 we so powerful, balanced and authentic. A fine example of how to compliment!

        • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

          Aw, thank you so much Bob!! Were you tuning in during that time? Thank you for your kind words!!! :hug: How did you find the entire segment by the way? Did you find it helpful in any way?

          • Bob

            Yes, I tuned in, I found the segment spot on, considering time limitations. Procrastination condensed into its essential elements lack of desire and fear. I always find it useful to hear you viewpoint Celes, because every time I learn a new perspective, a more subtle nuance that gives me a clearer picture of life and how we live.

  • Ken

    I complimented my best friend on being an amazing mother, and person today. There was a little accident this morning, and I think she was in shock for a while. She was also concerned about how her daughter was going to react to the bad news. Well her daughter took the bad news well, (I thought she would, as she has a very grown up, and has a mature outlook on life and if she is anything like her mother, she would have known it was an accident). Anyway, i encouraged her that it was an accident. She was perparing to be there for her daughter, but everything worked out. But that is the kind of person she is, a wonderful and amazing mother!

    Then there was the administrative assistant to my boss. I saw her in the mail room today, and I did notice something different about her. And I complimented her on her new hair cut. She was completely taken aback as no one noticed it at all today. But then doesn’t it mean it’s a good hair cut if no once notices when you got a hair cut? Anyway she made the comment again, that I need to keep up the happy mood, and charm. That i’ll find another special lady in my life in no time. So I think she gave me a compliment.

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      That’s really sweet of you to notice the assistant’s haircut Ken. :D Yes, little things like this really make a difference I feel. If I make a change that day, say by wearing different shoes or clothes, and someone actually notices, I would feel that the person is such a sweet pea. It seems that lady thought so too as she had reciprocated with a beautiful comment for you. Great job on Day 5′s task Ken! :hug:

      And I agree with her that you will find another special lady in your life in no time. I’m sure we will all find our social someones in our lives at the right place and moment. We just have to continue working on ourselves while being open to opportunities out there. :)

  • Faby

    I gave out more compliments than usual and tried to make them as genuine as possible. The one i believed was the most genuine was the on i gave my sister. I told her she had a great personality and that she was always in a cheery mood, even if she was having a bad day. I also genuinely told my friend that she was very nice for lending me a dollar. I hope my genuineness was transmitted through the words i spoke. :) I complimented my mom and sister on the food they had prepared.

  • Bette

    I told three different people that I felt warm loving feelings emanate from that which they were talking about. Which meant that they took the care to not just express the facts, but they put their heart and soul into it. They all were very moved by my perception of their caring, sensitive natures, and we all have shifted to a higher level of communicating with each other. Those relationships now have even greater meaning, which is a huge bonus. :heart:

    I love this Kindness Challenge and how many are truly going to the next level in being their personal best.in their daily lives. I am watching the world become a better, more loving and kind place! Being an active part of that transformation is deeply moving. :D

    Celes, I love how you find new ways of challenging us with our awareness and actions, and encouraging us to be our personal best. :bow: You really do stand tall and true to your website’s name, “Personal Excellence”!!! :clap: :hug: :heart:

  • http://onmymind.areavoices.com/ Qin Tang

    I gave genuine compliments to three people today –

    Beth Freschi, a life coach, for being one of the kindest and most generous people I have ever met in my life.

    My daughter, for being very talented.

    A stranger, for homeschooling her three kids.

    I hope I have brightened these three individual lives a little bit with my genuine compliments today, even for just a moment.

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      I hope I have brightened these three individual lives a little bit with my genuine compliments today, even for just a moment.

      Qin Tang, I’m sure you have. :hug: I’m sure your daughter feels very blessed to have you as her mom. You often speak about her in your comments and it’s obvious you care for her a lot as her mom and friend.

  • http://charity365.blogspot.com Marge

    I really enjoyed this one! It’s something I would do anyway, but I paid real attention to the responses I got and it’s lovely to see someone’s face light up when you tell them a positive truth about themselves.

    Compliment number 4 – Celestine, you are very thoughtful and positive!

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Thank you Marge! :D You are a very kind and thoughtful person yourself, by virtue of the fact that you are taking part in this challenge and your reaction surrounding others responses to your compliments! Thanks for being a part of this community. :hug:

  • Netta

    Giving genuine compliments isn’t hard for me. I truly enjoy getting compliments as well as giving them.
    I am able to compliment my friends because they are all unique. I complimented one of my closest friends today because she has a smile that can make anyone’s day brighter.
    I complimented someone close to me on their cooking. I’m sure when you cook a meal everyday, that it means a lot just to hear that it is delicious.
    I complimented a very talented friend because he is able to play the guitar as well as the piano and sing. These are very good qualities.
    I compliment my children daily on their looks and and their report cards happen to come also.
    This challenge was easy but I’m glad to see it because it made me more aware of how the most simplest of words can make a person feel better.

  • Hetal_S

    Late for posting it :rolleyes: but i believe better late than never ;)

    The details of the people I complimented :

    1. Best Friend : I told him tht he looks adorable and cute when he mimics his one year old nephew :hug:

    2. Sister : She brought some fantastic accessories which was pocket friendly :mrgreen: I just complimented her on the choices that she made.

    3. Mom : For cooking real awesome sweet dish for me :bow: :D

  • Fufu

    How many people did you give genuine compliments to today?
    What did you compliment them on?
    How did they respond to your compliments?

    11!! :D

    Mom – On her ability to be patient while cooking each day
    Dad – I asked if he could teach me how to make white rice because I like how he’s comes out
    Big Bro – He’s extreme interest and dedication towards tv shows
    Big Sis – My admiration towards her in how she dresses and it always comes out well
    Lil bro – His affection towards others
    Sister’s boyfriend – I said he looked good dressed up in military clothes
    My girlfriend – I said it’s her honest smile and comforting advice or help that make her beautiful
    Friend JP – Complimented his personality
    Friend AN – Complimented his personality
    Friend JU – Complimented her personality
    Friend JL – Said I found it awesome how he was able to take a picture with a cosplayer

    As for the reactions..I noticed that besides mom, dad, my Sis and her boyfriend, my little brother, my girlfriend(who liked my post since I wrote it as a status in facebook) and my friend AN and my friend JL the rest of the people I complimented just kept on with the conversation without commenting anything on my compliment..I don’t expect anything in return and I’m conformed with knowing I told them something good but I find it a bit confusing and found it kinda rude..unless they have their reasons. Either ways I’m happy I was able to compliment 11 people :)

    *Sorry posted a bit late it’s that I wanted to wait a while to see if the people that had not responded to me would respond but they just kept talking about other things so no response

  • Claire R

    A student did very well. Instead of just” good for you”. I praised her, gave a hug and told her
    how
    proud I was of her. I took the time to praise her and let her know the why and the how I
    saw this change.
    We shared this with glee. And others saw how it was and smiled along and joined in.
    A moment to treasure.
    - and then I started to do the same with all I met. It was wonderful and refreshing :D

  • http://www.mindset-coaching.com Dolly Yeo

    First compliment goes to you Celes :D
    Thank you Celes for sharing your gems! in the Passive Income course that I attended and just completed.

    What I like best is that you are open, honest and focus on VALUE most of the time. There are many best, I understand most of what you teach, and I am inspired to emulate you for you are the epitome of a young and successful entrepreneur and most important an authentic leader.

    You told the truth and make sure we understand that we must create and/or increase our active income focussing on VALUE first.

    Complimented:
    1) Son for taking the effort to repackage our TV channel, we saved 50% of what we used to pay. Gave him a hug too. He looked pleased and happy.
    2) My eldest daughter sent me a song through facebook which reminded her of my ‘never say-die-attitude’ , and I shed tears of endearment. Thank and complimented for her support, love and care through the challenging times we went through and it has made us stronger. She return a hug and love (through facebook)
    3) Youngest daughter for being focussed in her studies and her willingness to have profound dialogues after each misunderstandings, as a result deepen our relationship. She is pleased with herself and sailed through her project work. Such is the power of compliments!
    4) My daughter’s future parent-in-laws for being a dedicated mother, a man of wisdom. and they really are. We connected very well. Spoke for 3 hours after lunch as though we knew each other for many years.
    5) A buxom friend’s daughter who chatted with me through facebook, – I sincerely complimented on her confidence, intelligence, cheerfulness, smartness and what a great mother she has.
    6) Complimented my client who want to be an educational coach for doing a great job helping her student went through a self-discovery exercise successfully.

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Hi Dolly, thank you! :) You are so sweet that it’s so amazing. Thank you for all your wonderful participation throughout the passive income course. Thank you for taking the effort to revise your testimonial AFTER sending your first one because you felt the first one didn’t do enough justice to the course value! I thought that was really sweet of you and really spoke volumes about what a gentle and warm person you are.

      By the way, I’m really happy to hear that you have been including your children in your kindness acts and they have been reciprocating in kind! :D That’s really sweet, what you described about your elder daughter (in #2). I’m so happy for both of your relationship; it sounds like a really close mother-daughter bond. :hug:

  • JadePenguin

    I’ve been too busy to post my progress lately but I’ve been keeping up!

    1) Our lecturer made a little joke at his own expense (he gave an example of irony: “very exciting lecture, professor”), which is something I very much appreciate in a person, so I told him that. He seemed flattered :)

    2) We had a Bonfire Night bonfire and one girl got a nice fire started so I complimented her on that.

    3) A friend of mine created some meme-like joke pictures and I laughed. Laughter counts as a genuine compliment, no? :)

  • Celi

    I love to give compliments, because I feel it is a way to acknowledge them and how they impact my life.

    Though I pondered on this one and I discovered that I am quite selective to whom I give it. I would therefore like to concentrate on the people that I normally do not give compliments from now on.

    I did give a compliment to an old school friend whom I met this week after almost 40 years and I could not help to tell her that I could recognize her by her nice beuatiful smile. She then gave me an even greater smile! She presented a session to us and did it realy well, by facilitating participation instead of presenting theory. Unfortunately she had to leave before I could tell her how well she did it. But I will make sure that she gets it.

    I also complimented the staff who catered for us at a training session on the good food they provided. That brought smiles to their faces.

  • http://www.yourown360.com Ngee Key

    Giving genuine compliment is not easy, neither is difficult.
    Most important is to do it, it’s about action. And the feeling is great.
    Gave two compliments by email and one by SMS.
    Feel blessed and they feel blessed as well too :)

  • ugi

    Hello!

    I met a group of friends for a ceremony. One of my friends was wearing a different pair of glasses than her ordinary ones, and she was looking great with these. I expresses my like about her glasses and how well she looks with them, I was really sincere, I loved them! Another friend had her hair done for the ceremony and she had a different and very beautiful look than her everyday look, so I complimented her on her appearance. To tell the truth, I did not have the challange in my mind when I was doing these but later on remembered the challenge and was glad I completed the task. I also felt good about myself that I am good at complimenting whether with or without a challange behind..

    Happy days!
    Ugi

  • http://colormehappykids.wordpress.com Angela Brent-Harris

    I do believe I am a natural at giving compliments randomly on a daily basis. I was blessed with this gift. I complimented people telling them how it was lovely to see their light shining brightly, I complimented some on their hairstyle, their beautiful and radiant smile, their outfit, I complimented some teachers on how unique and wonderful their bulletin boards looked, I complimented on gorgeous shoes, even on a special project that a friend of mine did. I also complimented my 18 first graders…..infact, I filled their buckets by telling them something special that was unique to each one. I complimented my sons on the way they did their chores, their loving attitudes, I complimented my 14 yearold on his amazing report card. I am so proud of him. He worked hard and it showed.

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