Are You Sabotaging Yourself? Why Self-Sabotage Happens and How to Stop It

Looking deep into yourself

Self-Sabotage

Last week, I was reading this article on Forbes about why there aren’t more women on boards. The subject didn’t really interest me as much as this snippet caught my eye:

When we meet the Maria Klawes of the world – women who rise to the very top of their professions – we too often convince ourselves that we’ve got to be world-changing superstars to become GC of a Fortune 500 firm, CEO of a top tech firm in the Silicon Valley, or Managing Partner of an AmLaw 10 firm.

As a Forbes blogger, I’ve called dozens of men and women for comment on newsworthy events within their expertise. More than half of the ridiculously highly qualified women I spoke with told me they weren’t expert enough to comment.

No man has ever said that to me even when he was far less qualified than the women who’d demurred on the ground that they were not good enough.

From Forbes: The Real Reason There Aren’t More Women on Boards

Now, I’ve never really been interested in male vs. female or gender-specific issues – I think any attempts at classification (be it at a national level, racial level, religious level, etc) only serves to divide and separate (even when done with the best intentions). I’m more interested in human development, personal growth, and development of the human consciousness.

So when I saw the snippet above, I saw it as an issue of people selling themselves short, not just women. The interesting thing was, those people who were approached felt they were not expert enough to comment despite having already been handpicked by the interviewer herself!

Imagine you are scouted by the hiring manager of a highly prestigious company at an event. Believing that you will be a good fit for a new role that is opening up, she asks you to come down to her office the next day for an interview. Not confident of your abilities, you then tell the hiring manager that you don’t have the right skill sets and turn her down, even though you secretly want to get the job.

Isn’t that such a waste? I mean, if there’s already a hiring manager, who specializes in identifying people’s skill sets and matching them with her company’s needs, telling you that you have what it takes, shouldn’t you be ecstatic about the opportunity? Wouldn’t you want to jump right away at this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity?

The example above is very situational and may not seem like something most people would do. Most of you probably think that someone would be a klutz for saying no. In fact, you are probably thinking that you will never do something stupid like this.

Yet, most of us exhibit self-sabotaging behavior just like this in our daily lives, without even realizing it.

My Experience with Self-Sabotage

Take myself for example. For a good period of time, I had this mentality that I should never write an article or a book unless I was able to make it the best, most comprehensive, and more complete article/book on the topic – ever. Some people may call this perfectionism; others may call it neuroticism.

While this mindset was rooted in a good place (I wanted the best for others), it became self-binding. I had all these nuggets of insights that would go unwritten because I didn’t feel I was ready to cover the topics. For example, if I had an insight on how to address envy, I would hold off from writing about it because it was just one insight and not the big picture. My rationale was that these insights were minute and were not substantial enough (or rather, not good enough) to be published as articles on PE.

I didn’t realize that writing about the individual insights (without covering the entire topic) could provide great value to others too. It was silly because I lost dozens of article opportunities this way. These articles could have positively impacted hundred thousands of people out there because of PE’s reach and the permanent nature of the articles. A definite waste.

What turned me around was when I noticed how people would be positively impacted by the things I shared during simple conversations or email exchanges. These were things I had no problems sharing in daily banter, but had issues publishing on PE. I couldn’t help but wonder: If my casual thoughts and insights were helping these people, who was I to assume that they wouldn’t be helpful to others out there as well?

Clearly, my “must be perfect”, “must be complete” approach was limiting me. It stood in my way of helping others, when helping others was the reason why I even started PE to begin with. Not only was I doing others a disservice, I was also doing myself a disservice.

Realizing this helped me to focus on the bigger picture – my passion to help other people grow. Since then, I make a point to cross-check my beliefs regularly and ensure they support my end objective. If I ever have fears, insecurities, or personal hang-ups that stand in my way of serving others, that’s my cue to reflect on those beliefs and break them.

Another Example: Rejecting an Opportunity for Exposure

Some of you may recall the Successful Businesses Interview Series I did back in 2011, during the Million Dollar Challenge. I created the series as a way to inspire you guys with stories of successful entrepreneurs and give you insight to their success strategies, so you may apply them to your (future) businesses.

I reached out to the owners of highly successful businesses, from the likes of Groupon to CD Baby (multi-million dollar music distributor), most of whom readily took up the offer. A few rejected or didn’t respond, presumably because they had other things to do, which was fine. That simply meant our needs were not compatible and it was better to let them go.

What struck me was this response I got from a business owner. I was extremely picky with the businesses I selected, because I wanted them to (a) be respectable businesses I would personally endorse (b) have attained a certain level of success, since the point of the series was to share success stories. Whichever businesses I reached out to, I had already screened them and determined them to be great case study examples.

This particular business was a budding enterprise with a great message. It had not been around for very long but it seemed to be growing steadily, with an engaged customer base. I liked what it had to offer and thought it would be a great addition to the case study line-up. Also, I thought it’d be a great opportunity to help drive awareness of that business and perhaps attract new, potential customers for it in the process.

However, when I reached out to the owner, she declined because she thought her business was not established enough. While I accepted her response, I couldn’t help but think it was such a pity… not for me or the interview series, but for her. I could understand if the person had said she was not free, or she didn’t think the interview would be useful, or because she just didn’t want to, but to decline an interview (free, permanent exposure for her business no less) because she thought her business wasn’t established enough – as a business owner myself, I felt that was self-sabotage at its finest.

The Insidious Mind Traps of a Self-Sabotager

Turning this back to you, have there been times when you rejected opportunities because you thought you were not qualified enough? Times when you jeopardized your chances for success because of your self-limiting beliefs? Times when you stepped on your own foot just so you wouldn’t be able to take a few steps forward?

In those incidences, why did you do that?

Having coached many different clients, trained hundreds of people at workshops and oversaw hundreds to thousands of participants through the live challenges at PE, I see self-sabotage at work every single time.

For example, someone who deliberately dumbs down his achievements in his resume because he doesn’t want to appear pompous (a self-limiting belief). Someone who works hard at losing weight, then gains it all back with a series of poor eating habits. An aspiring video blogger who refuses to record videos because she’s waiting for a million things to be in place first. A great artist who sticks to drawing as a hobby, because he feels no one will be interested in what he has to share.

After examining many people’s self-sabotaging behaviors, I found two common trends.

Trend #1: Every self-sabotaging behavior is always justified by a reason.

Maybe you are a writer, and you refuse to start writing your new book because you want to feel inspired, and excited, and relaxed first. Maybe you want to lose weight, but you keep padding your diet with junk food because your family eats junk food and you have no other option (is that true though?). Maybe you want to create a video channel and share your knowledge with the world, but you keep putting it off because you want to have the right equipment, right set-up, right getup, and right everything in place first (but why?).

For every self-sabotage, there will always be at least one reason backing it up, which is in turn supported by multiple other reasons. These justifications encapsulate that (sabotaging) behavior and protect it from being shaken by other opinions, be it yours or other people’s. Addressing that behavior then becomes no different from getting through the labyrinth of self-justifications in your mind. Consider it as solving a puzzle, except in the mind.

Trend #2: We are the strongest justifiers of our self-sabotage.

For the longest time ever, I held back on outsourcing. I knew it was something I would have to do at some point as my business expanded, just that I never thought I was truly ready to do it. “Now is just not the time yet. I’ll definitely do this next time,” was what I kept telling myself.

The problem was, it never seemed like the right time. I had about a zillion reasons why I shouldn’t outsource just yet, from “It’s so much faster to just do this myself,” to “I want to learn the ropes first so I can handle things if they ever go wrong,” to “Hiring people costs money which can be spent on other things,” to “I don’t know any good people I can rely on,” to “It takes time to find good people.”

When I finally loosened the reins and outsourced various aspects of my day-to-day work (since end of last year), I realized I was stepping on my foot the whole time. I should have outsourced long, long ago, because it made me so much more effective. For the first time in a long while, I was finally spending my time on the core of my passion – content creation. Not administration, graphic editing, day-to-day stuff, or stuff unrelated to the core of my work.

This episode made me realize how elusive self-justification and self-sabotage can be. A lot of times, we may go all out to explain our actions to other people. We may even be able to convince others that what we are doing is really how things should be.

Yet, self-sabotage is tricky. It’s elusive. It’s insidious. It can masquerade something as righteous and good when really, it’s self-defeating and bad. If you want to overcome self-sabotaging behavior, you have to be the one to step in and say, “Hey, this isn’t right.” You have to be the one to do this, because only you know the labyrinths of your mind. Other people can tell you what they think, but until you acknowledge that, your self-sabotage will keep looping itself over, and over, and over, again.

How To Tackle Self-Sabotage

What should you do to ensure you are not binding yourself with self-sabotage?

1) Be Your Own Gatekeeper

Firstly, if you really want to correct self-sabotage, you have to be the gatekeeper of your thoughts, actions, and decisions (or non-actions, in some cases).

This means with everything you do, be ready to ask yourself: “Is this self-serving? Will this help me with my goals? Am I limiting myself in any way?” Be extra conscious about the thoughts you think, the actions you take, and the decisions you make, because you are the one who lives with them.

This doesn’t mean that you should be a devil’s advocate. No, not at all. A devil’s advocate is someone who takes the opposing stance for the sake of argument. Your role here is not to oppose but to examine the validity of what you do (or don’t do). You don’t want to undermine yourself. You do, however, want to empower and better yourself. Being more conscious and self-reflective is the key to that.

After realizing some of my past behaviors were in fact self-sabotaging, today I’m careful not step on my own foot. For example, I have learned to share ideas even if they may not be complete, as long as they provide value to others. I’ve also learned to be better at outsourcing. I’m constantly evaluating my decisions to ensure I’m not jeopardizing myself. I have found that I tend to overcomplicate situations and make things difficult for myself, so that’s something I’ve been working on. (Check out: How To Get Maximum Results When You Have Too Many Ideas (Harnessing The Superstar Effect))

2) Examine Your Thoughts… and Change Them if They Are Self-Sabotaging

Upon assuming the role of your gatekeeper, examine the thoughts that run through your mind daily. Do you carry thoughts that sabotage your intentions?

For example, let’s say you want to record videos and put them up on Youtube. However, you are afraid to do it because you don’t think your videos will be good enough. You also don’t think anyone will care to view your videos. Those are two self-sabotaging thoughts, right there.

Or let’s say you want to work at Forbes as a news writer. However, you hold back from submitting your resume as you gather they probably have lots of people applying for the job. “I probably won’t stand a chance. Why submit if I’m not going to get it?” you think. That’s two more self-sabotaging thoughts.

Self-sabotaging thoughts are like invisible ropes that hold you back from moving forward. You can’t see them. But you can feel them. If you want to stop sabotaging yourself, you need to remove these self-sabotaging thoughts. Delete them. In their place, instill new, empowering thoughts that will push you forward.

Refer to Days 26-27 of Be a Better Me in 30 Days Program for more on limiting thoughts and how to replace them with empowering ones.

3) Examine Your Behavior for Self-Sabotaging Actions

Many of our behaviors are things we do on auto-pilot, guided by our undercurrent beliefs, habits, and past practices. As your gatekeeper, it is your role to crosscheck your normal behavior for any self-sabotaging actions .

For example, I’ve a friend who runs an up-and-coming business. When she first started two years ago, she was heavily involved in the back-end of her business, such as product creation, quality testing, and talking to suppliers. If there was ever anything that required her to be in the “limelight” (so to speak), such as being in interviews, presenting at business conferences, or being a part of large social events, she would readily shy away from them. Because of her introverted nature, she preferred to do things from behind-the-scenes.

However, as her business grew, she realized that her natural disposition toward such scenarios was a self-sabotaging behavior that prevented her business from growing. By turning down speaking invitations at conferences, she was turning down networking opportunities that might spring into new business opportunities. By shying away from interviews, she was saying no to free business exposure. By staying behind the scenes, she was limiting the upward growth of her business.

Upon realizing this, she switched to a more liberal, proactive approach. Today, she readily takes up opportunities for exposure, socializing, and business networking. This is subsequently helping her business to grow in a new direction.

I’m not saying that all introverts have to practice being social. That’s for each individual to decide. All I’m saying is that what you see as natural character traits, habits, and reactions may well be self-sabotaging you without you realizing it. It takes a very conscious person to be able to take a step back, evaluate his/her behavior, and recognize, “Hey, maybe there’s more to this than meets the eye.”

Consider a daily behavior of yours and ask yourself these questions:

  1. Does this behavior help you with your goal(s)? Or does it hold you back?
  2. If it doesn’t help you, what is the approach that will help you then?
  3. How can you modify your current behavior to that of #2?

4) Understand the Reasons Why You Self-Sabotage (and Let Go of Them)

There are many reasons why we would want to sabotage ourselves. Maybe we are afraid of success. Maybe we are scared that we wouldn’t be able to handle it when we make it. Maybe we are scared there will be nothing left to do after we make it. Maybe we just want to keep things simple. Maybe we like to make things complicated for ourselves. Maybe misery loves company and we want to make ourselves miserable.

Without understanding your reasons for self-sabotage, your self-sabotaging inclinations will keep returning even after you address your self-sabotaging thoughts and actions.

Consider this scenario. Peter wants to work as games developer with Square Enix (a video game publisher). Initially he self-sabotages by convincing himself that he should not apply, since Square is such a renowned company. After overcoming his self-sabotaging thought patterns, he sends in his application and subsequently secures an interview, much to his surprise. However, during the interview, he self-sabotages himself by committing several interview blunders. In the end, he fails to get the job.

Here, Peter self-sabotages himself because he doesn’t find himself worthy of that opportunity. Hence, he does one thing after another to get in his way of success. It’s his way of convincing himself that he truly does not have what it takes, when the only issue in question is his low self-perception. (Read:  How To Be The Most Confident Person In The World)

For me, I used to sabotage myself in the area of writing and sharing because I was afraid to write things that wouldn’t be useful to other people. With regards to holding back from outsourcing, I sabotaged myself there because doing menial tasks, being occupied with them, and completing them in a regular fashion was my way of making myself feel useful and productive. Of course, these were just self-limiting beliefs. (See Point #2.) Recognizing these reasons and letting go of them subsequently eliminated the self-sabotaging behavior.

Ending the Cycle of Self-Sabotage

Practicing the four steps above on a regular basis, especially the fourth step, will be instrumental to weeding out self-sabotage.

For the chronic self-sabotager (think someone who procrastinates heavily, experiences frequent spells of laziness), it may take a while before you can act in a way that’s most aligned with your intentions and devoid of self-sabotaging consequences. That’s alright. What you need to do is to start practicing consciousness in your day-to-day thoughts and actions, via what I have shared in this article. Soon you’ll find your behavior more congruent with your deepest wishes, and less self-conflicting.

I hope you found this piece useful for you. Pass this article along to a friend or family member who may be a self-sabotager at heart.

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  • http://avene.org Glenn

    This makes a lot of sense Celes. Great examples you’ve included too. It’s quite clear you didn’t make these up either ;)

    I’ll confess, I’m guilty of this myself. There are a few things that come to mind. Although I usually do actually do things that I don’t think I’m good enough to be doing rather self sabotaging myself by avoiding them, where I probably do self sabotage myself is by not charging a high enough fee. But at the same time, people see that I’m offering value, and will recommend me to others.

    In some instances, it’s hard to tell. Your example about the video blogger thinking she needed the right equipment before getting started. Yourself a while back perhaps? On one hand that may seem like perfectionism. But if you want appear as professional as possible, getting that gear may be a good thing by providing you with a lot more confidence to get the job done.

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Hey Glenn, no that example isn’t about myself. If I’m talking an example about myself, I’ll usually call it out directly rather than frame it in third person. Video just isn’t my main priority so that’s not an area that I really focus on.

      I think the litmus test is whether the whatever criteria that is imposed is hindering the person from making progress. If it does, then it’s probably self-sabotage at work. The confidence thing regarding having the right gear is also subjective too. For example, why would the person need professional gear to feel confident, if not for a self-limiting belief? I can totally understand needing professional gear to make the quality of the output good and professional, but if it’s getting the gear *just* to feel confident/feel good, then that’s something to look into.

  • Sue

    I don’t know how you do it Celes, but you have again produced an article that is so pertinent to me at this time on my journey. I have, in the past couple of weeks realised that I need to let go of self sabotaging beliefs that are not serving me in any way. And then you tell my how to do it!! I am so, so thankful that I have ‘come across’ your website (although I don’t believe that I did – I was led there by something beyond my comprehension) because it was my initial contact with you on the challenge in March which unearthed my realisation about what was the root cause of my issues. I owe you so much. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Keep producing the articles! :hug: :hug:

    • Bette

      Hi Sue,
      I am so glad to hear that you are realizing the need to let go of self-sabotaging beliefs that are not serving you! I love your enthusism! :D What a relief when those sabotaging voices/beliefs are recognized and released! All the best thoughts to you in letting go of unnecessary beliefs, and allowing the helpful ones to take their place! :hug:

      I too, like you, believe that I didn’t just “come across” Celes’ PE website…I believe that I was led there by Something Greater, a guiding force that is looking out for me. I think when something inspiring for my greater good comes my way, I may not be able to “comprehend” it, because “It” is truly beyond comprehension, in the mental sense. Rather it is a “knowing,” perhaps a recognition, tuning into a Higher level. :angel:

      May your realizations and insights continue to encourage you!

  • Laurel

    Thank you Celes! Just last night I was thinking about how I sabotage my own goals and wondering how to stop. For me it’s a problem especially when the goals are just in the infancy/idea stage and it’s too easy to say “I’ll get to it later after: more research/ more experience/ more money/ more anything-that-I-don’t-actually-have.” I came to the realization that I’ll just have to bite the bullet and dive in anyway. Anyway, thanks for the wonderful, perfectly-timed article! :D

  • http://marbledmusings.com Linda Moran

    Excellent article, and one I need to pass on to a few folks I know. I’m seriously guilty of self-sabotage when it comes to my weight and health, and thanks to a few of your challenges I am overcoming that. But this article is so perfect for so many areas! I spent a somewhat sleepless night worried that I blew it with an article series I am doing for a marketing blog. I need to realize that as long as my intentions are true and good, missteps are okay.Another blog I read this morning gave me an idea to expand on the concept and make this stronger for next week’s article. Thanks for all you do! :clap:

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Aw, no problem Linda! :hug: Thank you for reading. I’m glad you found some of the past challenges useful! I totally agree that missteps are okay and it’s more important that we learn from them vs. resist them. I don’t think it’s ever possible to “blow it” with anything, be it writing or anything, really! All it does is help us to realize more about ourselves, and that in itself is invaluable.

  • Vania

    Hi Celes this article could not be more appropriate for my experiences- thank you so very much for this! Most of us experience this without even knowing (myself included). It is very important to be aware of out thoughts because it affects out moods and influences our actions. Thank you again and stay blessed! Keep up the great work! :-D

  • Arinze

    Great article, I think everybody at some time in their life can relate or use this!

  • Tenera

    Outstanding article!! This is so helpful!! Thanks so much for taking the time to share!

  • http://www.CoachingWithChristina.com Christina

    Hi Celes,

    This article is a gold mine!!! It really hits home for me–especially the parts about sharing articles that feel incomplete or imperfect and making videos. I love how you touched on the fact that this is so much about our own internal monitering systems, how we have to be responsible for knowing when we’re making excuses and monitor our own thoughts (especially since we can easily justify them to others and even to ourselves).

    Thank you!!!! :)

    ~Christina

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      My absolute pleasure, Christina!! Thank you for reading!! :D

  • http://travelingscrubs.com Kris

    Good thing I stumbled to this article, I have been reading your blog for a while now and found really good articles that helped me a lot.

    But I guess this article really portrays what’s going on with me. I keep sabotaging myself and realized the loss after that.

    i am always fearful of what others will say, and sometimes I just wanted to stop and tell that Im really not good enough. So my life couldn’t go forward and so on.. :(

    Thanks Celes!.. This is really a big help for me. :love:

  • http://visualizefitness.tumblr.com/ Ivona

    Amazing article :)

    I definitely do sabotage myself on many trivial and not so trivial things.
    For example, this semester we had a course where the professor encourages people to think and participate. On many occasions I had the answer to his question but I just didn’t believe I was thoughtful enough to have it right, so I didn’t speak up. In the end it turned out I was right 80% of the time. Wasted opportunity for extra credit, right there.
    Also in social situations, many times I stop myself from telling a story cause I don’t think it’s interesting enough.
    Most trivial of all, when Celes asked for suggestions on which topics to cover here I started writing and then erased the comment cause I didn’t think she would consider it. Such a silly self sabotage :lol:

    I’ll definitely be working on this aspect of personal growth and this article will help – it already did just by making me aware. And now on to applying the steps :)

    Thanks Celes :) :dance:

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      “Most trivial of all, when Celes asked for suggestions on which topics to cover here I started writing and then erased the comment cause I didn’t think she would consider it. Such a silly self sabotage”

      Goodness!! You should most definitely post your suggestions there, Ivona. The post is still open for comments if you want to post any. I’m actually planning my upcoming posts based on the suggestions by the readers. I mean I can’t get to every single one of the suggestions *right away*, only because there are so many, but I’m slowly working my way through them. In fact, the latest posts that I’ve been posting on the site in the past weeks are based on reader requests/suggestions from a while back.

  • Bette

    In reading this article on this important subject of self-sabotage, what comes to mind is to be aware of any sabotaging voices that may creep up in my thinking, trying to bully their way into my positive and optimistic attitude. There have been those in the past who have cast negativity and doubt when I have wanted to pursue something, or when I had a goal I was working on, or dream I was envisioning. If those voices creep up, or I encounter ANY negative voices, I need to recognize them for the imposters they are and move ahead with my own positive, supportive, confident thoughts.

    Also, this article really focuses in on the sneaky ways that some old part of me postpones or procrastinates beginning something, telling myself that doing an important project is just way too overwhelming, I’ll get interrupted, how will I ever gather all that information, write that story, publish that book, go through all those things/clothes/whatever…the list goes on and on.

    Celes, you have a brilliant awareness that shines light in even the darkest places. :D Your examples and suggestions and insights always make me think, and give me ways to improve. I am, like so many, grateful for the work you so generously share. :heart: :hug:

    Realizing that I truly do have the answers within, and with into my Inner Wisdom that guides me in the right direction, I am bound to know what to do, and muster up the courage, discipline, and patience to continue in the direction of my dreams and soul purpose.
    :heart:

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      Thank you so much for your kind words, Bette! :hug: You have such an infectious and warm energy that it’s incredible. Much love to you. :heart:

  • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

    Wow, all your responses are really blowing me away. Thank you so much everyone. It brings me a lot of joy to be able to write, share what I know, and help others to grow. Thank you for allowing me to pursue my purpose. In turn I’ll continue to write and share as much knowledge and insights as I can with upcoming articles. Hugs and love to all of you!!!! :heart: :hug: :hug:

  • Susan

    I am applying this right now. I have started writing a book on my life journey. My mother always said — Who would want to read that? For years I never began the book because of her comment. I have now dismissed her comment. It doesn’t matter who would want to read it. It only matters that I want to write it. The act of writing is what will make me happy and satisfied, regardles of who reads it.

    • http://personalexcellence.co Celes

      You go Susan!!! You’re absolutely right that the satisfaction and happiness you will get from writing is what’s really important. That people become positively impacted and influenced from reading the book is an added bonus that will come after you finish writing the book.

      It’s the same approach I’ve since adopted with my writing – I’ll write to share and I’ll share the best I can (in serving my mission/purpose), but ultimately I can’t control who will/want to read and who will be influenced/impacted or not. For the people who do read my material and gets something out of it, that’s the biggest add-on and bonus for me that I can ever ask for, but otherwise I do not expect others nor compel them to read what I share here on this site.

    • Bette

      Hey Susan!

      I’d want to read your life journey just based on what you’ve said here!!! :D

      Way to go dismissing mimimizing, discouraging comments that belittle your dream. :clap:

      Here’s to being inner-directed and dreams coming true! :heart:
      :hug:

  • camilla

    Best of luck to you Susan…the world needs more writers, not fewer!
    I’d love to read your book, and Bette, great comment about dismissing comments that belittle your
    dream. If you haven’t seen the Pursuit of Happyness at some point along the line, I would strongly
    encourage you to see it/ rent it somehow, as it gives a valuable lesson in the power of dreams.

    Celes, I think you’re amazing and wish I had discovered your site a long, long time ago!

    Camilla

  • http://www.glynisj.com/ Glynis Jolly

    I enjoyed your post. There are times when I have to stop myself from doing myself in on a project. I ask myself why I’m not doing the obvious or I am doing something that doesn’t service my cause. If the reason sounds ridiculous to me, I adjust my thinking. :rolleyes:

  • http://www.mysnorkelgearreviews.com/ harry

    Excellent post. I think most people self sabotage is because people are afraid to leave their comfort zone.

  • http://Jolakapaj@yahoo.it Jola

    The only limits are the one we put to our self, right?

  • Nicole

    Thank you so much!! I really struggle with this behavior and have just recently recognized it. This article really gives me more to think about and how to fix this behavior.

  • Nina

    Hi Celes!

    First and foremost I enjoy your Blog very much! With this article I notice similar things that I am doing to myself. I am a junior soon to be senior in college and I’m in my last summer before my final year. I was supposed to have that internship that would pave the path to my future career….but I didn’t end up getting it. I had applied to maybe about over 50 or so places and I believe I had the right qualifications and references….but the fact that I didn’t get them really bothers me and is kind of depressing me too. And I give myself the excuse to do nothing about it. I keep applying but I either don’t hear back from them or its a no…and its really hard cause I’m living in the states with a couple of friends and I feel like I’m a burden on them since I don’t have another place to live.Plus all my other friends have found their dream jobs and internships and I know not to compare myself to others and everything, but sometimes I keep on falling into that trap and I don’t know how to get out of it…..and I was hoping to get some advice from you about that. Thanks Celes….

    Sincerely ;)

    Nina

  • Wiz Khalifa

    Now I got a difference between sabotage and self-sabotage, thank you Celes.

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The Superstar Effect: How to Get Maximum Results When You Have Too Many Ideas

Hi Celes, [how would you recommend] organizing one interests for maximum productivity? I know a lot of people, myself included...

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