Kindness Challenge Day 13: Give Someone a Treat

This is Day 13 of the 14-Day Kindness Challenge held in Nov 2012, where we do different acts of kindness for 14 days. The challenge is now over but you can do the tasks in your own time. Visit the overview page for all the challenge tasks.

Hello everyone! :D Welcome to Day 13 of the 14-Day Kindness Challenge! ;)

Day 10: Send Flowers to Someone :)

Finally accomplished my task for Day 10, on sending flowers to someone! :) Have updated my progress on Day 11′s post, complete with pictures. Refer to the section “My Day 10 Review: Send Flowers to Someone”.

My Day 12 Review: Forgiveness

Day 12’s task was to: Forgive Someone.

True to yesterday’s task, I wanted to forgive as many people as possible. I thought about all the people whom I still bore resentment on some level, be it subconsciously or consciously, be it from the littlest of incidents or the biggest of conflicts. People whom I had still not forgiven whether because I never had the chance to process the grievance or because the grievance was too deep for me to work through in the past.

So I listed as many names as I could and worked through my past grievances for these people yesterday.

By way of this review section, I’d like to use this space to “declare” (see it more as a self-declaration) that I have forgiven the following people in my life:

1. That business acquaintance who befriended me to get my business contacts a couple of years ago. I have forgiven you for jarring my natural trust and faith in others. May you understand the meaning of true friendship with no agendas attached. I give you the benefit of the doubt that you were unconscious about using people for business purposes, that you were simply overzealous in your business goals, and that there is good in you as a person.
2. That acquaintance who made many empty promises and did not live up to his words. I have forgiven you for your lack of authenticity and poor social etiquette. May you one day understand the importance of staying true to words and commitments.
3. The friend from my past who took to flaming me on my blog under an alias (years back) and made harsh, debilitating statements about me. I have no idea why you did that and I guess it’s no longer important. I’m sorry that you carried so much hate and I hope you can release them from your consciousness in due time. I have forgiven you for the hurt you caused me and I hope you have since moved to a better place.
4. That friend who lost her temper at me (whom I talked about in part 2 of my anger series) and turned into a black, nasty soul in the last few minutes of our friendship. I’m sorry our friendship had to end that way. I have already apologized for the grievance I had caused you, and if you chose to hold on to your anger, then it’s your choice. I forgive you for the sadness you caused me and I hope you will one day move to a better place.
5. That friend who had, on multiple occasions, triggered deep episodes of self-doubt in me. I have forgiven you for the sadness you caused me. I now recognize that there was nothing I could have done to make things turn out differently. I hope you will find the salvation that you need but I have finally acknowledged (in my heart, to myself) that I’m not the person to do that for you.
6. The friend who was discouraging to me when I shared my problems with her. I trust that you were not being malicious in your intentions. I thank you for your friendship and I forgive you for the doubts and sadness you caused me during that time.

I feel so much lighter now. :) When you release your past grievances, the person you are truly salvaging is yourself. For those of you who have not posted your update for Day 12 or who have not done Day 12’s task, hop on to the comments section and use it as the forum to process your grieve and unhappiness with others. At the end of it, make the conscious decision to let your grieve go and forgive them.

Now, let’s move on to Day 13’s task, shall we? ;)

Day 13: A Treat

Isn’t it nice when you get a treat from someone? Be it when a friend foots for your bill, when your tab gets mysteriously paid for, or when someone buys you a meal out of the blue?

For one reason or another, I often get treated by others. When I was traveling in Europe and United States last year, the friends I made there and the people who hosted me would graciously treat me time and again. Even in Singapore, I often get treats from others out of the blue.

I never expect any of those people to treat me, but they do anyway. (While we’re on the topic of treats, I actually don’t expect guys to treat me on dates either, because I think it’s not fair to expect the other party to pay just because he is a guy.) Whenever someone offers to foot the bill for me, I’m always pleasantly surprised. I just feel I’m so blessed and lucky to be surrounded by such gracious and generous individuals.

Because I often get treats, I know how good it feels to receive a treat. While I’ve been brought up with the notion of going dutch, I realized that giving others treats is quite a wonderful feeling. Not just for the recipient, but for yourself as the person giving you the treat. I’ve adopted the practice of giving others treats since my world trip and I say it has made me a more generous person. It has made me less definitive on boundaries between me and others and instead embrace the oneness ideology (not just emotionally or mentally, but now fiscally as well).

So, your task today is to give someone a treat! ;)

Your Task: Give Someone a Treat

Meeting anyone today? Having breakfast, brunch, lunch, tea, or dinner with anyone?

Give the person / the people you are with a treat! :) Doesn’t matter if they reject (out of courtesy)—just treat them anyway!

For the adventurous people, try footing the tab for the person after you or the person sitting at the table next to you.

If you’re not meeting anyone, you can still make the treat happen! Buy something for your housemate / family. Get lunch / dinner / tomorrow’s breakfast for them. Get the groceries! You guys are creative—I’m sure you will think of something! ;)

(Images: Hands holding red seeds, Family eating)