21DJC Day 6 – What Frustrates You?

This is Day 6 of the 21-Day Journaling Challenge (21DJC) for Nov 2011. View list of tasks: 21DJC Overview.

Hi everyone – Welcome to Day 6 of 21DJC! :)

Yesterday’s question was: “Who Is the Most Important Person to You in the World?“.

As usual, I had a lot of joy reading your responses. Some of you stated your mom as the most important person to you. Some of you said your father. Some of you said it was yourself. Some of you said your child(ren). Some of you said your spouse. Then there were other answers, including God / a higher power / spirit, your pet, your friends, etc.

There’s no right or wrong answer, because what’s important to us is relative. The same for all other questions posed in 21DJC – there is no such answer as a one, true answer. There’s only what’s true for yourself, and the objective of 21DJC is to invite you to reflect, connect with your inner self, and growing through the self reflection.

If you haven’t not realized, the very process of answering the questions for the past 5 days have helped to clarify your thoughts. Some people may look at the questions and think “Ah, I’ll think about it later” or “This is too much for me and I can’t be bothered to think”. But for these people, they feel resistant toward the questions because they’re in a mental fog. And this fog doesn’t go anywhere until they sit down and properly think about what they are resisting.

By thinking about who is the most important person to you in the world, it has helped you to gain awareness of who matters the most to you, and hopefully, made you realize how much you should treasure him/her. You live only once, so don’t hold back on your emotions towards this individual, thinking that you have “next time”. Be true to him/her and let him/her know of your gratitude towards him/her. Be grateful to the universe for bringing him/her into your life.

Me, the most important person in my life is my higher self. My parents are among the dearest to me in this life. So are my best friends, and good friends. And the same goes for all of you out there in this world; the very people whom I’ve dedicated my life to help to grow and live your best lives. There is no dispute that all of you are infinitely important to me.

But my higher self – the person who orchestrated my birth into this world, who has been watching me silently all this while, who has been supporting me in my life, who has been with me through thick and thin, who has always given me strength to carry on – is pretty much the reason why I’m even here, in this world. There’s still so much I don’t know; so much I have not done; so much I have to do, and I know that my higher self will be with me all the way till the end, to guide me, to support me, and to carry me whenever needed.

Because of her, I’m here. Because of her, I’m now living in alignment with my highest self. I’m far from being my highest self yet, though I’m working in that direction. The day will come when I will come full circle with her, and I look forward to that happening one day, soon.

Important: Get Your Gravatar

Some of you have gotten yourself an avatar since the start of the challenge, while many of you are still appearing as Red PE Logos! (i.e., the default profile picture that appears beside each comment)

While I love the PE logo, I would love even more to see an individualized picture when I read your writings. I’m sure the other participants would love that too! It can be your real life photo, to a picture of your favorite flower, to your pet, to some scenery, to some quirky text. The point is to let your true self shine.

To set your custom profile picture, visit Gravatar, register your account (Important: Make sure it’s the same email as the one you use in your blog comments) and upload your profile picture. Your picture will automatically be reflected in all your blog comments where you had filled out the same email address as the one in your Gravatar account.

Look forward to seeing your new profile pictures! ;)

With that said, let’s now move to Day 6!

21DJC Day 6

After reflecting on the most important person in our life, today’s question brings us to a different emotion – but a very true one. Today, I’d like you to reflect on:

What Frustrates You?


Think about the times when you tend to feel frustrated. What typically happens in those times? What is it about those incidences that frustrate you? And why?

Put on your reflection cap and let your thoughts flow. Below is an empty form which you can use to write your answers to the question. Treat it as your private 21DJC journaling “room”, if you will. You will be seeing this form every day, for the 21 days of the challenge. There’s a button for you to keep track of your word count too, if you’re interested.

(Note you will not see the form below if you’re viewing this in your email client. Visit the actual post online to see the form.)

What Frustrates You?

Your Task Today:

  1. Reflect and answer today’s question. There’s no word limit – whether minimum or maximum. Write as few or as many words as you want. It’s all up to what you want to express!
  2. Share your answer. After you are done writing, copy and paste your answer in the comments area and post it there.
  3. Check out other participants’ answers. Other participants will be sharing their answers too, so feel free to read and reply to their answers. This is a group course, so let’s support each other in these 21 days.
Look forward to reading your answers! :D

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« 21DJC Day 5 – Who Is the Most Important Person to You in the World?

21DJC Day 7 – What is the Most Important Thing You’ve Learned in Life So Far? »

248 Responses | Share Your Results!

  1. pksd says:

    Myself when I slump and don’t do the things that make me feel good. When we get frazzled because things haven’t been organised in good time. I usually try to blame other people but I am cross at myself really because I know it was preventable if I hadn’t been lazy. It is frustrating because it is unnecessary stress.

    Like: Thumb up 0

  2. I get frustrated with people’s ignorance most of the time!!
    I just hate it when people are acting stupid!

    I also feel frustrated when someone is disrespectful to others and talks with a bad manner!
    I don’t know it just doesn’t feel right!

    Like: Thumb up 0

  3. Mastermind says:

    i appreciate this exercise and i get frustrated when i cannot find the new question after numerous logins.

    Like: Thumb up 0

  4. Zita says:

    What Frustrates You?

    I learned that each time I am frustrated, it boils down to ME and my unmet expectations! Many years ago I was ranting about my frustrations and a wonderful friend sat there very calmly and listened. Each time I would take a breather, he interjected and asked “why…?” And after a few rounds of this “ranting and “why…?”, and all the frustration has dissipated, I usually ended up with a deflated “oh my gosh”. It was really all about me after all…and my unmet expectations! Here I have taken all the tension into my body, blood pressure rising, heart pumping, teeth grinding, fists clenched…and when all was said and done, it was ME! When another has not acted, behaved or responded as I expected, FRUSTRATION starts brewing and maybe even erupt.

    Does this mean I don’t get frustrated anymore? Heck no. I don’t get frustrated as often or after going through the Why exercise, I am able to decide for myself what to do about it.

    As I write this entry, I’m trying to keep frustration at bay as a person so rudely act amongst us and everyone telling me not to let it bother me. I’m not sure if tolerating rudeness and someone’s tantrums on a regular and on-going basis in our midst is okay!
    Okay…so I’ve learned to at least not to allow it to affect my body as it used to by finding something to be grateful for. Yes, it’s a cure all! A simple exercise is to find 100 things to be grateful for!

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  5. Carly says:

    Frustration in my life stems from a few different things in my life.
    1. When people aren’t responsible
    2. When people aren’t caring towards others
    3. School
    4. One friend of mine

    Like: Thumb up +1

  6. Charles says:

    Very few things frustrate me. But among those few are when people take things I say the wrong way. I never mean harm, disrespect or insult to anyone but often, one person in particular seems to take exception to just about everything I say, do or want to do. That makes me feel invalidated, disrespected and put down. Then I get really frustrated with myself when I don’t rise above the ignorance and allow myself to be sucked into it. I do know better. It just happens before I can give it a thought.

    One other thing that frustrates me is a sense of overwhelm. I feel like I have too many things going on all at the same time and end up performing most of them poorly or just not completing them. I am in the present most of the time and VERY EASILY distracted from focusing on longer range higher priority activities.

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  7. Rakshitha says:

    There are many things: when I get a lot of not asked for suggestions, when I don’t get any advice although I need one, if others are playing the role of critics, a movie or a serial which hasn’t a message in it and is very tasteless or which portrays a story that is opposite to real happenings, when others are indifferent or put me down, when I do not get expected response from other person, when I am held responsible for something I am not, impracticality, pretence one more thing added by evening smoking in public places ( here it is banned by the government) and people chewing and spitting tobacco by the side of road which is still prevalent in our country. I scolded him not to his face (some stranger) but as I walked along, when the bus /vehicle driver mindlessly horns…

    What happens during those times?
    I don’t like to get frustrated as it makes me lose my cool, I do not listen what others are saying at that moment, I fail to take right decision when I am frustrated and I cannot see things as they are to be looked at. It is just that all the above frustrating situations annoys me.

    What could be the solution to my frustration?
    I have to pause (take a deep breath) before reacting, if I can say to other party that I like or dislike particular behavior I should make them known.
    I have also noticed that after some time I feel bad for the way I reacted rather for what happened because it is only my reaction that has something to do with me and my frustration may make others feel the same.

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  8. Nour says:

    I’m not sure I get the word frustrate really means to me but I think this could be my answer. Is not something that frustrated me most of the time, I would say I being frustrated by myself that I should be more open mind, balancing myself, can handle it on what I have been through. I feel frustrated of my low self esteem, fear of public speaking, communication problem, opinionated, negativity, narrow mind, my weak mental, emotion, and physical. I feel frustrates when I bullied by others, dishonest, bad faith, people look down on others; people blame me without knowing what’s really going on, people who don’t care of my feeling, people who don’t respect me. When I’m very frustrated I’m quiet, I cried, I thinking of it for a period. My father frustrates me because he is a gambler and likes to drunk, he always quarrel with my mom and he hit. I know I’m not the only one with a problem family and there’s a lot worse than me.

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  9. Ezza says:

    What Frustrates You? What Happens and why?

    Honestly, I never really feel frustrated as I am a very calm and neutral person. Do not get me wrong… I do feel frustration as any other human being. I deal with mine very quickly and process it instantly. I get over things very easily nowadays.

    I think the only attribute, that does frustrate me (when it happens) is the three voices I get in my mind and the threes that I feel pulling me this way and that. Its my inner dialogue. Its like having three different people living in you. I am not sure whether it is because I am on the cusp of Cancer and Gemini, the sensitive one and the two twins. :( But I find myself torn between three ongoing things and it doesn’t matter what I am doing unless its something I am passionate about, this can be frustrating. Overtime, with practice and patience the process is easier and more fluent. I do fight with this when I make a deep and huge commitment – example: The inner feeling/inner dialogue is like when you do a test of multiple choice questions and answers there is a multitude of responses you make to answer one question and find a solution. Its very much I am running a tread mill and suspended in animation.

    At the end of the day, I can make quick decisions (if I need to), take responsibility and make the best of any outcome.

    I thing I always remember: Frustration is a sign of internal conflict and self made stress.
    All the Best :heart:

    Like: Thumb up 0

  10. zoom6628 says:

    2 things vying for top of my frustrations list…..which is an very short list. One is when i cannot do something that i feel in my head and heart i should be able to do. Usually its around sports or programming. The other thing is seeing people not doing the most obivous things that would benefit themselves and others. I do however recognise these frustrations are just reflections about how I see myself. I do not accept my own limitations and situations fully and with an open equanimous mind.

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  11. MrsSilver says:

    What frustrates me the most is when I don’t feel like I’m in control of a situation. This happens in particular in two different ways:

    1) Things that are truly out of my control, like awaiting a decision that’s not mine to make. When I’ve had to propose a salary/pay via e-mail for a job/project/gig I want, while waiting for a reply I go over it in my head time and time again, wondering what the outcome will be. Have I aimed too high and will I lose this opportunity? Or, the opposite – will it be really easy to get paid for this and should I have requested more? It generally turns out ok, but it makes me nervous in a frustrating way. Having worked and still being working for people suffering from pretty major personality disorders, the outcome is sometimes quite the surprise…

    2) Things that generally should be in my control, but that I’ve let go of or lost control over. Examples would include knowing I have to be somewhere at a certain time, but yet running late with no obvious unpredictable outside excuse to refer to. Or not being able to finish projects on time, in general. The procrastinating/running late side of me is really frustrating and I really want to grow up and stop doing that once and for all. All it’s causing me is frustration and anxiety anyway, and I don’t need that in my life if I can prevent that.

    Like: Thumb up 0

    • Jeffrey Q says:

      I agree, losing control is one of the most frustrating feelings in the world. Though I am not sure if it in most cases is caused by lack of discipline or not paying attention.

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  12. Jeffrey Q says:

    I am frustrated by:
    -people who are ignorant and close-minded
    -inability to affect things beyond my control
    -being paralyzed by fear
    -unfair trades
    -being unprepared

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  13. Brian says:

    Frustration is a far more common occurance in my life then I’d like it to be. There are situations that frustrate me, as well as certain people that frustrate me but I most often find that I’m frustrated with myself. I’m frustrated at my lack of focus and motivation. I’m frustrated at my inability to see clearly a path with which to travel on and I’m frustrated by my inability to listen to my own intuition. I’m frustrated that I’m not sure where to go next in my relationship or if I need to end it. I drown all these frustrations out with distractions and the cycle repeats itself as I get more and more frusrated and resultingly, more and more depressed.

    Things that normally frustrate others like my girlfriend don’t frustrate me. I’m very calm, cool and collected when dealing with other drivers on the road and I’m polite and patient if I have to wait in line somewhere. Certainly I have my moments where that isn’t always the case, but 

    I find myself waiting. I’m left waiting for some sort of catalyst that will wake me up and help me realize that I need to change my ways and how I approach life. I guess I already realize this, but I’m waiting on something to motivate me to enact change. I’m smart and fully cognizant that I have the ability to create my own reality yet I’m never concious of it often enough to put this knowledge into actions that would better my life.

    And that’s what frustrates me. I resonate w/ Ivona’s comment in that I’m frustrated my not having any power over myself. To by my own catalyst for change. While I believe that only you can change the course of your life, my inability to do so thus far has me look for an answer externally.

    Like: Thumb up 0

  14. Yen says:

    After pondering the question, the following people/circumstances are where my frustration would burst when they occur :):

    - I don’t like mean people, hiding everything to themselves and even cheat others to gain recognition to them.
    - I don’t like pushy people. They keep approaching me to join certain organization and boast about it, especially network marketing (sorry). They usually can befriend with anybody and seem to care about that person. However, when they don’t get what they want, the relationship could fail or they are not as nice as before. I don’t know what word to describe it, but I think they are not true to others.
    - I don’t like people who don’t keep their promise. Really I can’t work in a company that even the boss say one thing and do another (like don’t meet quality as promised), when people are not on time in a meeting.
    - I don’t like people who are too nosy in my private area. My father intervenes too much in daily chore in my house for I feel that I don’t have any freedom to live my own house
    - I don’t like to be given bad customer service or work in company that don’t uphold customer service
    - I don’t like people that are not environmentally friendly. For example, using of nilon bags: they ask for more nilon bags than needed when they go shopping then throw away even when they can be used for many shopping times.
    - I don’t like me when I do something stupid: I was too gullible to believe in a bad friend who cheated me. Also I don’t like when I feel empty or not proactive, or not being able to do things I like (I had it when I was in bed due to accident), I don’t like to be dependent on anybody, especially in terms of money. Well, having said that, now I actually love myself more so that I am not affected by all things that frustrate me. All I could do is to acknowledge and learn lessons from them.

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  15. ELLEN says:

    I get very frustrated when my best friend took me for granted at some point of time. Even after telling her that I am very busy at some point of time, she still wanted me to help her out of the way financially. Also, for people who demanded for things instead of requesting definitely irks me.

    I am very frustrated when I see inept people at the Top of the Management made irresponsible decisions and we will have to come in to do the remedy actions. They also practise favouritism and nepotism which is very undesirable in this society.

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