21DJC Day 13 – What Do You Fear Most?

This is Day 13 of the 21-Day Journaling Challenge (21DJC) for Nov 2011. Read the announcement and details on the challenge here: 21-Day Journaling Challenge.

Hi everyone – Welcome to Day 13 of 21DJC! :) Yesterday’s question was: “What Are Your Biggest Goals in the Next Few Years?“. (Read the responses.)

It was really very exciting reading all your upcoming life goals! I love setting goals, because when we do them, we become architects of our life, envisioning what we want to see in our life, rather than living it based on what we have before us now. Goal setting is the first step towards living a conscious life of our creation. Read more: 6 Important Reasons Why You Should Set Goals

I have a lot of huge things which I’m very, *very* excited to start working on for the upcoming period. One thing is definitely Personal Excellence. Having reached the one million pageviews / month mark a month ago, I’m very excited to hit the next major traffic milestones: such as 2 million pageviews / month, 5 million pageviews, 10 million pageviews, and so on. After 3 years of running the site, I’ve come to realize that all my other business goals are ancillary to this goal, because when I hit a higher traffic, all other things naturally fall into place, be it helping others to grow, hitting revenue targets, receiving new business opportunities, media mentions, and so on.

The other thing which I’m very much looking forward is having my talkshow. Long-time readers would know I had a short-lived talkshow 2 years ago, The Celes Show (You can see it at CelesShow.com, though the site has been abandoned for the past 2 years and not updated). I stopped working on it because it took up too much of my time from PE, and I realized it wasn’t the right time for me to launch the show, because the foundations of PE was not laid out at that time (the blog was only 1 year old at that time).

But now, I think it’s time for me to consider bringing it back. I won’t be doing it right away now, because there are still other factors of consideration, and also because I still want to work on broadening the reach of PE first before I move into other projects. But it’s fair to say that I’ll look into it with a more serious intent sometime next year (2012).

That said, it’s one thing to set big goals and dreams, and another thing to take action to achieve them. Keep in mind what you have written for yesterday’s question, because we are going to get working on them really soon. In our upcoming Live a Better Life in 30 Days next month (Dec), we will be drilling into our life goals with more detail, and creating an action plan to achieve our goals. It’ll be an exciting month, an opportunity to review how 2011 has been for us, and an excellent way to end off the year of 2011 – with a big bang and a huge vision for 2012, which I see as a year of new beginnings. :D

With that said, let’s now move to today’s question!

21DJC Day 13

Today’s question is deviates from the 12 questions so far:

What Do You Fear Most?

What Do You Fear Most?

What are you living in fear of? What are you most afraid to see happen? And why?

(Today’s question can be found in #60 of 101 Important Questions To Ask Yourself In Life. For those who own Personal Excellence Book, Volume 1, be sure to check out How To Overcome Fear (3-part series), exclusively written for the book.)

Put on your reflection cap and let your thoughts flow. Below is an empty form which you can use to write your answers to the question. Treat it as your private 21DJC journaling “room”, if you will. You will be seeing this form every day, for the 21 days of the challenge. There’s a button for you to keep track of your word count too, if you’re interested.

(Note you will not see the form below if you’re viewing this in your email client. Visit the actual post online to see the form.)

What Do You Fear Most?

Your Task Today:

  1. Reflect and answer today’s question. There’s no word limit – whether minimum or maximum. Write as few or as many words as you want. It’s all up to what you want to express!
  2. Share your answer. After you are done writing, copy and paste your answer in the comments area and post it there.
  3. Check out other participants’ answers. Other participants will be sharing their answers too, so feel free to read and reply to their answers. This is a group course, so let’s support each other in these 21 days.
Look forward to reading your answers! :D

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« 21DJC Day 12 – What Are Your Biggest Goals for the Next Few Years?

21DJC Day 14 – What Is Love? »

132 Responses | Share Your Results!

  1. Jesse Barkume says:

    Hmmm… Fear. haha I use to be afraid of everything and then one day my father told me that the fear is all in my head and that when I am afraid that I should take it as a challenge to overcome and prove myself to no one else but myself:) He told me fear was a good thing to have and that fear is what keeps us alive. he also said there are many fears that are useless and made up out of thin air.

    I remember being very young and suffering from night terrors and again my father told me that when I was scared of something that I could not die in my dreams and to turn around and just let the monster eat me and then when I was in it’s belly I could just crawl out the other end, haha. and it worked. I was not afraid of anything anymore.

    until I realized that i don’t live in a dream and I can get hurt, disabled or even die! but then again my father told me that life is what we make of it. he said look at all of the religions and different beliefs in the world and said how could there be just one and all the others were wrong. he said non of them are wrong. that people were missing the point. that they were all just different paths to get to the same point. back to our true selfs.

    And so i created my own and choose to believe in rebirths. so now i’m not even afraid of dying anymore because i can try it over in the next life. but he also made me realize that life is not easy and that it takes a lot of work so it makes sense to get it right the first time:)

    wow long background just for a simple fear but if I had to name something that I fear of most it would be living a long healthy life full of adventures, laughter and great memories but having never found it’s counter part, soulmate, lover, partner or simply best friend. I’m afraid of being 40,50,60 or even 70 and going home to an empty house. even though I know in my heart that i’m never truly alone, the rest wouldn’t matter without that smile, hug and kiss everyday:)

    Like: Thumb up +2

  2. Vanessa says:

    My biggest fears is that someone will kidnap my child. I am so overprotective of him I can’t hardly be away from him for a second. When I go to the store I put him in the buggy. I will not let him walk next to me without holding my hand. This might just be some anxiety brought on by my mother ranting about how it can happen to me. I have fears of death of loved ones. I have fears of messing things up for myself. I have fears of failing at school. It is so important to me. In my late 20′s I have already experienced family and friends not having much to do with me so I am not afraid of that. I fear of dying without being able to be there for my son and watch him grow up. I had a few potential health problems that turned out to be nothing. I don’t won’t to miss out on being there for him and watching him grow up. Also fear of someone hurting my kid.

    Like: Thumb up +1

    • Vanessa says:

      I think my insecurity will cease of being afraid of someone kidnapping my son when he starts preschool. As for dying to young I am becoming a health fanatic so I will live a long time. As for loss of loved ones everyone is in good health at the moment nothing to worry about. We all die eventually it is apart of life and I will handle it the best I can if it ever happens. Also with school I will never give up and I will finish. No matter how long it takes I will keep pushing forward because failure is not trying.

      Like: Thumb up +1

  3. Bob says:

    Not being able to cope with life, finding the right words for the occasion, fear of death.
    I am changing my mindset now and I am finding strategies to deal with these on a daily basis.

    - Learning from my mistakes by writing, noting the correction and visualising the next time without an error.
    - Looking at successful people at seeing what techniques they use and experimenting with their ideas to see what works for me.
    - Reading inspirational thoughts.
    - Practice, practice, practice.
    - Discussion it always unearths fresh ideas, new methods and aids in clarifying my thoughts.

    Life is a game and preparation is a significant part.

    Like: Thumb up +1

  4. Lottie says:

    My biggest fear is always for my children and my husband. I truly can’t bear the thought of the death of any one of them. I realize, as I write, is that what helps most is to appreciate each of them as much as is humanly possible each and every day – and also to let them know how much they are appreciated and loved.

    If I’m honest, I know I also have a fear of being happy – as if that is wrong somehow. I have often felt that it is wrong to be happy when others suffer so much and also because I think I don’t deserve joy and happiness. So irrational, I know. This fear is related to another fear I have which is a fear of being myself. I am really pleased to say that I am becoming increasingly happy in my own skin – it is a continuing process though. Seems so silly written down, but it’s been a major fear in my life – fearing who I am!

    Like: Thumb up +1

  5. Alban Brice says:

    What I fear most is Public Speaking. Fear of stammering in front of crowds. And this is why I join Toastmasters International to overcome this fear.

    Like: Thumb up +2

  6. Dora says:

    What I fear the most is when I gonna lose my parents!

    This question pop up to me when they went through surgery and also when few of my friends told me that one of their parents or close relative passed away or even at work, when going through customers’ paper work that make me realise how hard it is to lose someone dear to you.

    I will spend more time with parents where and when I can, pamper them when I can..

    Don’t know how I gonna handle it when it will happen, but meanwhile stay positive and pray that parents live long…

    It’s kind of sad but we all have to face this situation one day

    Like: Thumb up +1

  7. May says:

    There is nothing to fear but fear itself-FDR

    That was the first thing that came into my mind.

    However, I think that is easier said than done. I am afraid of everything from rejection to failure, sicknesses that my family members have, and many more. I fear that I will become the person I don’t want to be, I fear I will hurt those around me, I fear for the way I act. I fear that my attitude will explode and make ones around me hurt.There are too many things to be afraid of in this world.

    I fear for many things, I wish to get out of it. I fear that I will take life for granted.

    There are too many things to be afraid of…too many sorrows. But without it, life would not be the way it is right now.

    So perhaps we should turn fear into a positive energy and embrace those “fears” and learn from it. Turning “fear” into an experience in life will be one of my life goals.

    Like: Thumb up +2

  8. Iris says:

    I think a lot of people probably have said this – but failure scares me the most. To me, failure is also associated with disappointing others and not meeting expectations (whether they were set by me or others). It leaves me depressed, restless and hopeless and often demotivates me for a while. It is definitely not an easy thing to overcome but I try to think of it as a way to change perspectives – What did I miss? what caused failure? How could I have done differently, and how can I move on? What can I do better? This last question is probably the most important one to overcome the fear, since it could be a milestone for new success.

    Like: Thumb up +2

  9. Lex says:

    Is “snakes” a stupid answer ? Probably. I could also say that I’m afraid of the dark (not perfect darkness, which is really good to sleep or think, but this almost-dark state where you don’t see things but can discern their shadows). It’s childish, I know.
    My biggest fear is being alone. I don’t mean not having anyone love me, but really being alone, with absolutely no interaction. No chats on the computer, no meeting friends in a bar, no school with annoying people in it. Nobody. No music, no art, nothing. Being alone – that would be truly terrifying.

    Like: Thumb up +1

  10. Elezhara says:

    I would say I´m not really afraif of anything.If for some reason I feel afraid of something I try to rationalize what´s happening to me and I try to stay calm and relaxed, always looking for solutions no matter how bad the situation is.
    But there is one thing I´m afraid of. I´m afraid of dying without being able to do everything I want in life, without fullfiling my dreams or at least fighting for them. I don´t want to die knowing that I didn´t do everything I could have done, that I didn´t fight for what I believed. My dreams are so importantant to me, and I need to know that at least I tried my best even if I didn´t get what I wanted. I´m afraid of giving up.

    Like: Thumb up +1

  11. Lynda says:

    my biggest fear is that I will never find a home, somewhere where I will be safe and able to stop and get off the roundabout call uncertainty

    my only other fear is that society will continue to encourage individualism to the detrement of connect to other humans and the stories we all have will no longer be given to other and none will be given to us and the spirit of the universe will cry out in isolation,

    the following is an extract from my book but it says clearly what I feel and fea

    Humans are a social creature, that’s the way we were made. Being with others and talking and listening to what other people have to say is how we learn and grow within ourselves. It is how we gain insight to who we are and who we want to be. With the creation of computer networking social interaction has become a two edged sword. On the one hand people that have some issues with face to face contact are touching people they normally wouldn’t interact with, however the other side to the sward is tht people that have no problem with face to face contact have become shut away and societies all over the world are placing huge limitations on what knowledge and ideas and insights are outside in the beautiful world because more and more people are hidden behind their phone, computers and ipods. We don’t talk to strangers even to say hi. So we end up with the same knowledge and ideas and no inspiration to learn more. I find that very sad.

    Like: Thumb up +3

  12. Charles says:

    - Losing a family member. My family is so precious and I don’t want
    anything to happen. My father died when I was 17 and my younger
    brother died of cancer in 2007. Is this fear irrational? Is there
    anything I can do about it except love my family every day which I
    am doing?

    - Losing my sense of SIGHT. That would be the worst handicap.

    - Losing my sense of HEARING. No hearing means no communication and no
    enjoyment of music, speech and the sounds of nature

    - Death. One day it will happen – i would be happy to live to 90.
    But I live to make the most of each day so as to have no regrets.

    - Fear of deterioting brain function – dementia, memory loss, or any
    mental illness.

    - Losing my job. I can always get another one!

    Like: Thumb up +1

  13. Tanya says:

    The thing i fear the most is FAILURE.
    I fear not getting my degree in civil engineering, or not passing my classes.
    I fear making mistakes because of the consequences they might have and the people I might end up disappointing.

    Like: Thumb up +1

  14. EllaElla says:

    I am afraid of change. Sometimes I have big dreams and than I get scared and do nothing to make them come true.
    I am afraid of being alone in dark.
    I am afraid of the Borg and not being able to live free.
    Most of all, I am afraid of failing in every aspect of my life.

    Like: Thumb up +1

  15. Arnold Tse says:

    I’m not afraid of anything because I’m too young to fear. At least… that’s what I constantly tell myself, even though I know it’s far from true.

    For the most part, it benefits me to pretend that I’m fearless. Otherwise, I would never have taken that first stroke in the swimming pool and wander into that area where my feet can no longer touch the bottom and I have nothing to hold on to. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have went out on all those excursions around the city, without a map and without even a bottle of water. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have confessed to her…

    There are some things that I should fear, but I am too bold/stupid/young and naive to fear. I have taken risks that could have landed me in the hospital. I have taken risks that could have led my peers to ostracize me. And I still take life for granted (probably because none of my friends and family have passed away yet).

    But I do fear. My greatest fear is probably rejection. I remember how I used to pester my friends with phone calls and MSN chats just so I wouldn’t “lose touch” with them. I remember how I used to spill my heart out to girls I like because I thought that way, they’d “love” me more and I would be less likely to get rejected. I still do such foolish things, just not as much.

    My fear of rejection is the reason why I get rejected, most of the time. I make mistakes because I’m afraid to make mistakes.

    What’s the worst that could happen if I get rejected? I start back on square one. I wouldn’t lose anything, I just wouldn’t have gained anything. But I still can’t help being afraid…

    Like: Thumb up +1


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