Kindness Challenge Day 11: Be Kind to Someone You Dislike

This is Day 11 of the 14-Day Kindness Challenge for Nov 2012 where hundreds of participants from around the world get together in spirit to do 14 acts of kindness over 14 days. The challenge is now over, but you can do the tasks in your own time. Visit the overview page for all Kindness Challenge tasks and posts.

Join the Kindness Challenge!

Hello everyone! 😀 Welcome to Day 11 of the 14-Day Kindness Challenge! 😉

We have hit the 800th Participant Mark!!

11th day into the challenge, and we have now hit the 800th participant mark!!! 😀 *throws confetti into the air*

I consider our kindness challenge to be a huge success, both in terms of the number of people we have gathered onto the challenge (though I’ve never set an actual target but simply aimed to get as many people as possible) and the overwhelming responses I’ve been hearing from people who are taking the challenge, about the change they have seen in their lives and responses they are getting from others.

Day 15 will be roundup day, so I’ll be reserving roundup comments till then. If you still want to join us in the remaining 3 days, do so here:

The 10 Tasks To Date!

Here are the 10 beautiful tasks of the 14-Day Kindness Challenge so far. Four more to go!

My Day 10 Review: Send Flowers to Someone

Day 10’s task was to Send Flowers to Someone.

(Task accomplished on Day 12, Nov 12 as that was the day when I met the people whom I wanted to give the flowers to. Have documented the process below!)

Got up bright and early (5:20am) to head to my aunt’s shop to get the flowers I pre-ordered from her!

Flower shop

At my aunt’s shop early in the morning! She’s inside the shop doing the flowers (you can’t see her in the picture).

Bouquets of Flowers

The beautiful bouquets (four of them!), in a bag and all ready to be hand-delivered (by me) to their recipients! 😀

UFM 100.3 Recording Studio

Looks familiar? 😉 This is the UFM 100.3 recording studio. The four deejays of 不给一口叮 (the morning segment) are the intended recipients of my flower task!

I ended up getting a cameo on the day’s segment (Nov 12) as I shared a little bit about the Kindness Challenge’s progress so far and presented the flowers to them on air.

UFM 100.3 Deejay Wenhong

Wenhong, the anchor deejay for 不给一口叮, with his sunflower bouquet! 😉 The sunflowers are to wish that he will forever bring sunshine and happiness to the deejays and guests on the show. 😉

UFM 100.3 Deejay Limei

And here’s Limei, one of the deejays, with her beautiful roses. I gave her the roses to wish that she will remain forever youthful and beautiful.

With the UFM 100.3 Deejays

From left to right: Wenhong (黄文鸿), Li Mei (叶丽梅), Myself, Xiao zhu (小猪), Yanwei Xiao er (彦维小二)

I’m just happy to have brought a pleasant surprise to them and smiles to their faces. Now, on to the next kindness task! 😀

Day 11: Someone You Dislike

Unhappy person

Is there anyone you dislike in your life?

It could be that kid who was critical to you in high school. It could be your current manager who is unreasonable with the deadlines he/she has been assigning. It could be that colleague who went behind your back and tattled on you to other colleagues. It could be your ex-best friend who took you for granted and ruined the friendship. It could be your previous relationship partner who cheated on you with someone else.

I try not to hold grievances against anyone as I’ve come to realize that the person who suffers is myself, not the other person (read part 2 of the anger series and Be a Better Me in 30 Days Program, Day 25: Forgive Yourself). Yet, there are times when I come across people whom I can’t help but feel irked by. I may ignore these people, forget about them or try to ensure our paths won’t cross, but the point is that I usually would not take to these people kindly if I were to ever meet them again. As they say, once bitten, twice shy.

However, while it’s one thing to hold your ground and be firm (staunch) with people who have crossed you before, it’s another thing altogether to treat them with kindness. I say it takes a different person, a bigger person, to behave kindly to these people.

After all, the people who were unkind / are behaving unkindly to you may have their own reasons. Maybe they had a bad day. Maybe they were just being themselves and they didn’t know they had offended you. Maybe they were stressed out. Maybe this. Maybe that.

The point is there can be a zillion reasons why someone would openly or unknowingly offend you. And while you cannot change how the person act, you CAN control how you think, feel, and act. You can control your thoughts, feelings, and actions… and you can control whether you treat this person in kindness or not.

So, how about treating these people (whom you are not a big fan of) with kindness? For when you treat people kindly, you inspire others to be kind too. You help to make the world a better place.

Today (and for the rest of your life), your task is to be kind to someone (people) you dislike!

Your Task: Be Kind to Someone You Dislike

Think about the people you interact with on an ongoing basis. They could be people in your social circle, workplace, business contacts, or  family.

Is there anyone in these circles who has been mean-spirited, rude, harsh, or terse to you before? You might not dislike them (after all, disliking someone is quite a strong feeling), but you might not like them too.

I want you to think about how you can be kind to this person from now on. The next time you see him/her, treat him/her in kindness. You might want to apply some of the acts of kindness you have picked up in the past 10 days on him/her. For example: Talk to someone you don’t normally talk togive a genuine compliment, give a hug, or write a thank-you note.

Some of you might say that you can’t think of anyone you dislike or anyone who has treated you unkindly. I want you to think deeper. There will be someone who will come to mind.

For example, initially I couldn’t think of anyone (in my life now) who is unkind to me. But after some probing, someone came to mind. This person has been somewhat terse in the communications with me, though I’m not sure why (and it’s none of my concern too as I have explained above). What I’ll do is I’ll continue to treat this person with kindness and hope that it will help this person to see me in a different light one day.

Share Your Results!

Who is the person whom you are planning to render your kindness to? How are you going to render your kindness to him/her?

Check out the responses of other participants in the comments section!

After you are done, proceed to Day 12: Forgive Someone.

Image: Lorenz Seidler

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